User blog:Pierzina/Total Drama Reloaded – 02. Truth Hurts

Author's Note: Me and my co-writer are absolutely flattered by the positive reception! We've already planned a good amount ahead, but are still keeping things interesting for ourselves, too. We hope you enjoy this episode and expect the third episode in a few days.

Chris: Previously on Total Drama Reloaded...fourteen brand new contestants arrived at a not so new island to compete in a classic competition of betrayal, romance, and drama. The contestants were introduced one at a time and split into two teams. The Radioactive Rats, made up of B, Dakota, Dawn, Lightening, Sam, Scott, and Staci and the Mutant Maggots, comprising of Anne Maria, Brick, Cameron, Mary, Mike, Molly, and Zoey. Their first challenge was to scale the 1,000 foot cliff from our first season. Different game plans came into play as Mary commanded her team into helping her climb the mountain manually, while on the Rats B and Dawn made a contraption to simply catapult someone up there. And for Staci, let’s just say she was in the wrong place at the right time. [laughs] Staci’s sacrifice allowed the Rats to score the W, sending the Maggots to elimination. It was looking like Mary would be going back to coaching the Glee club, but lucky for her Molly brought in Anne Maria and Brick to blindside the early power trio of Cameron, Mike, and Zoey, sending the bubble boy out of the game. Now, thirteen remain, who will spill their guts out in our next ridiculous challenge and who will puke their guts out via the Hurl of Shame? Find out right now on Total Drama Reloaded!

[it’s a beautiful morning, all the campers are sound asleep, until...]

[military alarm ringing]

Brick: Riiiiiise and shiiiiine!

Mike: [screams as he falls to the ground] Wh-what’s going on?! IS THE SKY FALLING AGAIN?!

Brick: Relax, honourable teammate! It’s just my alarm, haha.

Mike: No offense, but that is anything but relaxing! My limbs are still trembling in fear. [shows Brick his arm, which is shaking uncontrollably]

Brick: [shrugs] To each their own. Anyways, I wanted to talk to you about last night. I owe you an explanation.

Mike: [rubbing his temples] Yeah, that’d be nice.

Brick: [CONF] Last night I had to blindside one of my teammates. It’s not something I really enjoy...as a soldier I like to hold myself to the highest standard, which means full honesty at all times. However, Molly brought up a really good point about Mike, Zoey, and Cameron being too close and I had to nip the bud of a possible mutiny as soon as possible. I would’ve told them but you can never be too sure with an immunity idol floating around, though I still don’t feel too great about it.

Brick: I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you. I know if anything Mary did nothing to prove to us that she deserved to stay, but I had to think about the long term. Cameron was our weakest member and I didn’t want to be the next to go if you three decided to stick together.

Mike: Who told you we were together?

Brick: Uh… Molly.

Mike: [facepalms] You see the issue here dude? She’s just trying to open the game for herself so she can start a girl’s alliance and if that happens, we’d be outnumbered 4-2.

Brick: Not to worry, Mike. I know Molly and she is an honest and kind girl who would never do something like that.

Mike: [CONF] Truthfully, I am a little hurt by seeing my buddy leave so early in the game. The only real upside is that it wasn’t me or Zoey.

[outside the Rats cabin, Lightening and Scott are playing a fierce game of basketball]

Lightening: [dunks the basketball] Bing bing bing! Another point for the LIGHTENING!

Scott: [rolls eyes] You haven’t let me serve the ball once!

Lightening: Quiet, fool. I am in the ZoOoOoOoOOOOONE!

Scott: [CONF] Nobody in this place, let alone team, are cool enough to chill with. I mean, geez. What does a guy gotta do to have some pals to chuck wood with and “accidentally” step into the girls locker room? Huh?

Scott: Whatever, I’m calling faulty.

Lightening: Please, I am 100% all natural.

Scott: More like you’re 100% a cheater.

Lightening: Oh really? Well if you want the ball so bad, then why don’t you just go ahead and… take it, pig boy?

Scott: Fine. [Scott tries to steal the ball from Lightening]

Lightening: [evades him] Up high! Down low! Too slow! Sha-pow! [Lightening jumps in the air and slams the ball through the hoop] You just got stuck by Lightening, baby! [puffs chest arrogantly]

Scott: You mean, struck. Pfft. [scoffs] Show off.

[meanwhile in the mess hall, Dakota is waving around her phone like a wand]

Dakota: Uuuugh! Where is the reception in this dump? [looks over at her female contemporaries] What is with the producers of this show and casting such… distasteful examples of females!

Zoey: Femininity can be displayed in different ways than being a prissy brat, [plops down tray with visibly inedible food] and you are aware that this is in the middle of nowhere, correct princess and the flea?

Dakota: Flea? I’ll let you know I am VERY well groomed. Wouldn’t say the same about you, looking like you just walked out of a trashy nightclub in the bad side of New York!

Anne Maria: Yas, get her red!

Anne Maria: [CONF] Yeah, I know she’s on the other team. So? Zoey had it coming, she took my place in line to brush that dusty ass squirrel she got glued to her head this morning! I ALWAYS get first dibs in the washroom.

Dawn: [flushed] Oh dear.

Zoey: It’s always the girls like you who have to say things about MY expression. Take your whole holier-than-thou attitude elsewhere.

Mary: As much as I would like to exempt myself from this girly, “feud” thing, I have to say that Zoey does have a point and actually sets herself apart from your whole spoiled brat shtick.

Zoey: [shocked] Really? ...Thanks.

Anne Maria: Not so fast. Zoey comes up here acting like she’s all “cool” and “special” yet she has something to say about other peeps’ attitudes. She’s a whole hippopotomous!

Zoey: Hey! You’re supposed to be on my team!

Mary: Yeah, who’s side are you ON?

Dakota: [blows raspberry]

Dawn: I believe the term you meant to use was “hypocrite”, Anne Maria, which is not exactly false. However, I feel like we’ve unearthed a lot of emotional trauma that is indebted with growing up as an adolescent female and being encouraged to compare yourself to your cohorts. Instead, this should bring us a sense of unity rather than divide us. [pulls out a small notebook] Who wants to do some therapeutic exercises to encourage a safety net of love and protection?

[the girls all look at eachother for a minute]

Staci: Nah.

[all hell breaks loose, with Mary and Zoey and Dakota and Anne Maria engaging in another heated arguement]

Dawn: Oh, gods. [frowns]

Dawn: [CONF] I am clairsentient, so I feel the energy and emotions around me very vividly. Zoey’s necessity to feel validated and Dakota’s desire to constantly be the center of attention clash very intensely. However, that wasn’t necessarily all that I was sensing.

---

[the scene now transfers to B, who is currently working intently on a blueprint]

B: [writing down formulas]

Sam: [snoring loudly]

B: [glares at Sam, breathing out frustratingly]

Sam: [settles down]

B: [lets out a sigh of relief and proceeds to continue]

Sam: [starts gurgling a mixture of snot and slobber in his mouth, still dead asleep]

B: [angrily crushes the pencil in his hand and starts to nearly blow a fuse, before he notices a rat in a corner. He swoops down to take the rat and drops it in Sam’s mouth]

Sam: [muffled gibberish, begins to wake up] H-huh? [notices the rat and shrieks]

B: [whistles]

Sam: [rushes to the bathroom to brush his teeth]

B: [smiles to himself as he hears Sam’s cries]

[suddenly, the intercom blasts with the same sadistic voice they’ve already gotten used to]

Chris: [voiceover] ATTENTION, CAMPERS! Your challenge will be held at the beach in 10 minutes! You might wanna bring a wetsuit.. Hehhahah…

[the campers travel in a group and begin making their way to the challenge site]

Mary: [whispering to Molly] Hey… I never got time to uh, th-thank you..? It’s really cool you took a chance on me. I, uh, a-appreciate it.

Mary: [CONF] What? I don’t thank anyone except my mom for blessing me with my athletic capabilites and undeniably hilarious sharp wit.

Molly: Oh, that? It was no problem. Just simple strategy.

Mary: Well, good. So don’t expect me to go easy on you, or anything. We’re not… friends, or whatever you people call it.

Molly: Note taken.

Molly: [CONF] I’ve never felt the need to have friends. They disappoint me.

Anne Maria: Ugh, can’t believe we’re havin’ anotha challenge in the ocean! It’s gonna take a whole tinna hairspray to keep my poof stable.

Lightening: You call that helmet of hair your poof? Ha! You’re pretty funny, poofy girl!

Anne Maria: [sternly] My name’s Anne Maria. [smiles] But uh...thanks?

Lightening: [CONF] Lightening didn’t come here for no love fest, he came to win! Not gonna lie though, that girl Anne Maria... she ain’t half bad.

Anne Maria: [CONF] [dreamily] That Lightening… he’s a real hunk of man. I’d love to [CENSORED] and then [CENSORED] right in the [CENSORED] [CENSORED] [CENSORED] with him any day. Yeah, that’d be nice…

Zoey: [glaring at Dakota]

Mike: What’s wrong, Zoey? You look a little.. on edge. Is it that time-

Zoey: Oh my god, do NOT finish that sentence!

Mike: ...I was just gonna say, is it that time you spent in the mess hall? I heard lots of… screaming. I didn’t want to investigate, y’know. Give you girls your privacy.

Zoey: Ugh, we’re girls not caged animals. It’s fine, it’s fine. She just has a different viewpoint that I've taken upon myself to vehemently oppose. She's like the Britney Spears while I’m the Christina Aguilera. It's not fair.

Mike: Wouldn’t you want to be Britney, though?

Zoey: No, MIKE, you don’t GET it! I’m being judged. No one feels pain as deeply as I do, no one knows how it feels to be ME! Ugh! [storms off]

Mike: Darn. I always mess the comforting part up.

Sam: [puts hand on Mike’s shoulder] Don’t fret dude, it’s just that time of month.

[Everyone is strapped into chairs above the ocean. Each team has a separate booth, with their team design on it]

Chris: Welcome to the "Getting to Know You" trivia game challenge. Everyone strapped in all nice and snug?

Scott: [grunts] Too snug. It's cutting into my shoulders.

Chris: Yeah. Children-sizes harnesses will do that. [chuckles] I'll be asking our players embarrassing personal questions, and I mean majorly humiliating. If the player I'm talking about gets the poorly wired buzzer and owns their humiliation before the time runs out, their team gets a point. Another way to earn a point is if you can manage to guess WHO’s secret I am referencing. First team to five wins part one and a distinct advantage in part two. But if no one owns up, this happens.

Dakota: Quick question!

Chris: Yes?

Dakota: Could we do like, anything else?

Chris: No.

Dakota: I would frown, but I don’t want wrinkles, so I am just going to nod and smile!

Chris: Now… onto my favourite part. PUBLIC embarrassment! [pulls out a cue card] This contestant… is NOT from the city they claim to be from?

Scott: What kind of question is that? Who cares.

Mike: Sounds like something someone who is hiding a SECRET would say! [eyes Scott]

Scott: Don’t even try me, bub.

Anne Maria: Eh, what the hell. [presses down the button, shocking her, and frizzing her hair up]

Everyone: [gasps]

Brick: Woah, you’re not from Jersey?!

Anne Maria: No dip, Sherlock! I’m Canadian. I’ve just always wanted to be a Jersey bikini babe on the beach… does it really matter? No! Hit it with the next question.

Chris: Fiiiine. [reads from card] Which girl has never kissed a boy?

Lightening: Easy! Fat girl or man girl fess up!

Staci: Sorry to burst your bubble, but I’ve actually locked lips with a guy. It was horrifyingly awful beyond words. But still, it’s apart of the history of my pitiful existence. Do you have any other invasive questions you’d like to ask? [raises eyebrow]

Mary: Hey! I kissed a guy. It was an accident... but it counts!

Dakota: [extremely flustered]

Zoey: [raises eyebrow and presses down on her button] Well, I think it was the perfect princess, Dakota. Haven’t found your Prince Charming?

Chris: Zoey… is correct!

Sam: Wait, really, what is a babe like you out here doing without having kissed someone lips? If you need a volunteer then- [Dakota pinches his lips]

Dakota: [crosses arms] Listen, this is all GOSSIP. I mean… you’re all worse than the tabloids! Of course I’ve kissed a guy… just…

Chris: If only that wasn’t a lie! [dunks the Radioactive Rats, prompting bubbles of gurgling]

Dawn: [coughs up a starfish] Christian, this is highly unethical. Aren’t you concerned about the effects your behaviour is having on the fauna of this area? You should be ashamed.

Chris: Not at all. But I am concerned about this question: who has an irrational fear of [chuckles] GERBILS!

Scott: If only Bubble Boy was still here, that’d be an easy one. Mike: [to his team] If it’s one of you just admit it! It’s not that bad… maybe mildly humiliating.

Mary: Well, it wasn’t me.

Brick: Sorry man.

Chris: Fine, no takers? Your secret is safe now, then. Lightening.

Scott: Agh! Seriously? Why didn’t you just ADMIT it!

Lightening: Lightening ain’t afraid of nothing, man!

[a small mutated gerbil crawls out from Dawn’s hair and makes it’s way up to Lightening’s seat]

Lightening: [screams and whacks the gerbil underwater]

Dawn: [gasps] Lightening! That is unacceptable. [about to take off harness]

Chris: Who doesn’t know their birth parents?

Everyone: [looks around awkwardly]

Dawn: [freezes up before she presses down on the button] ...I’m not ashamed of it. It’s become a part of me.

Dakota: Oh my gosh, Dawn, that’s so sad. I don’t know what my life would be if I didn’t have my daddy buying EVERYTHING for me!

Scott: [rolls eyes]

Staci: [rubs Dawn’s shoulder]

Dawn: I know my worth now.

Chris: Congratulations! You scored the first point for the Rats. It’s now edging up at a 2-1, with Maggots leading. Next question...who peed their pants on the first and last day of school?

Brick: [goes red in the face] …

Mary: I know that look. Just fess up soldier, that’s an order!

Brick: [smacks his button and sighs] ...It was me.

Chris: Brick...is correct! That’s 3-1 for Maggots!

Mary: [snorts] HA! Wait’ll I start calling you Private PeePants

Mike: Mary! Not helping. It’s okay Brick, you did what you had to do for the team.

Zoey: It's still funny though.

Chris: Next question..who once lost their top in a public pool?

Staci: It was me. [smacks her button]

[everyone looks at her]

Chris: Well, uh. Staci is...correct! The Rats can still come back and win this!

Sam: Oh man, these questions are embarrassing! Sucks for you guys, hahaha.

Chris: Next question...who let it rip on their first date? [Sam stops laughing]

Dawn: Oh dear… that would be quite humiliating, wouldn’t it?

Scott: I’d expect it from any of these prissy girls, but half of them already went. Us guys don’t care about crap like that, isn’t that right Sam? Sam?

Sam: Is it possible we could get a different question?

Scott: Seriously? Oh man that is RICH! Hahaha! [He cackles]

Sam: Yeah alright, it was me.

Chris: Then we’re tied 3-3! Hmm, too much admitting, not enough dunking! Time to crank it up a notch! I’m cutting your time in half and pulling out some harder questions. Next question, who played Juliet in their school’s production of Romeo and Juliet? Any takers?

Scott: Mike looks like the type of guy who’d do drag.

Mike: Hey!

Chris: No takers? Fine. The answer is...Mary. [dunks the Maggots]

Anne Maria: You kiddin’ me? That girl couldn’t make a good princess if she tried!

Mike: I gotta say, Mary. Not a side of you I ever think I’d see.

Brick: Well I for one find it very cool that Mary has so many sides to her character.

Mary: No one asked you, Major Wuss.

Brick: I was just trying to help.

Brick: [CONF] I don’t know what Mary’s deal is. Normally I’d be thrilled to have such a competitive ally and adversary in the game but her attitude is a real damper on the team. If she keeps this up, I don’t know that I can do anything to help her.

Chris: [pulls out the next cue card] Next question...who had a “neat freak” phase as a kid? [Scott immediately slams his button]

Scott: I’m not ashamed of it. That’s just not who I am anymore.

Dakota: Yeah, cause smelling like pig barf is so much better!

Scott: Hey! At least it’s whole grain pig barf!

Dawn: [nods] Mother Earth approves.

Chris: Rats lead 4-3! Who’s best friend is a pet rock?

Molly: [hits her button] I do. His name is Baxter.

Chris: O...kay. Moving on!

Molly: [CONF] I don’t see what’s so weird about talking to a rock. He listens to me when I need to vent better than most people do.

Chris: Who here slipped on a banana peel at their school talent competition?

Mike: That was me. I gotta say, it wasn’t the most ap-peel-ing way to go out! ...Nobody?

Staci: Nope.

Chris: Almost done here...who still listens to My Mineral Attraction?

Mike: That band of edgelords? [elbows Zoey] Some people have no taste, do they?

Zoey: Shut up Mike! They really helped me through some hard times in my life and-

Chris: Aaaaand we’re out of time, and since you never hit the buzzer you’re going for another swim. [Chris dunks the Maggots again] Last question...who’s real name is Beverly?

Scott: [looks at Dakota] Come on, Dakota can’t be your real name if you were born in Canada, can it?

Dakota: Can to! My daddy gave the most beautiful name to his most beautiful daughter! [blinks]

Scott: Then who is it? Everyone else has gone except-

Chris: Time! The correct answer is B!

Sam: That’s classic! You got a chick’s name, dude!

Dawn: [furrows brow] B has chosen to use a nickname that makes him feel comfortable. It is not our discretion to question it. Shame on you for even bringing this up, Chris.

Staci: Well, I’m bored. All our secrets are out on the table. Might as well have lunch!

Dawn: Staci don’t be in such a rush to move on from every moment of your life just because of your low self-esteem.

Staci: Uh… okay. Anyways, lunch. Chicken salad anyone?

Dakota: I’m Vegan. How about grilled cheese?

Chris: Actually in case you all forgoooot, we have another element to this challenge.

Mike: Ugh, what more can you do?! You already spilled our guts out for everyone to see! What’s next, open-heart surgery?

Anne Maria: I’m with geek squad over here. I’ve had enough Total Dramaramabamawhateva for one day.

Chris: It’s not over till I say it’s over!

Brick: Let me out! Let me out! [trying to rip off harness]

Chris: I wouldn’t do that if I were you, you’ll need it for our next challenge. We’re going to a distinct part of the island where it is below 0 degrees, and those will help keep your temperature at a safe measure.

Mary: [looks over at Anne Maria and Zoey’s outfits and begins to laugh] Haha! I knew covering my body would come in hand unlike you two skimpy bimbos.

Zoey: At least we don’t sweat like stallions.

Anne Maria: And look like girls. [blows raspberry]

Mary: [gets embarassed] Bah, whatever.

Chris: [hands a map to Brick and Dakota] Meet me there in ten minutes or I’m disabling your safety harnesses!

[the cast sighs as he uses a jetpack to zoom off]

Sam: Wait… how are we supposed to get out of these booths if we’re strapped in?

[the scene transitions to a snowy atmosphere complete with an active blizzard]

Mike: [shivering] G-gotta love plot convenience!

Mary: Stick to looking completely average and leave the zingers to me.

Zoey: C-can’t we get some coats? Maybe a sauna?

Brick: [completely unphased by the weather]

Anne Maria: H-how are you NOT on your knees from this cold right now, G.I. Joe?

Brick: [shrugs] The cold never bothered me. Must be my big heart that spreads the warmth through my body! [smiles]

Mary: [rolls eyes]

Brick: [CONF] I’m a very empathetic person. Being in the military, it’s a good trait to have. You have to think about the innocent people you’re saving as you’re training to kill other innocent people!

B: [wrapping Staci and Dawn around him so they can be warm]

Scott: Pfft, i-it’s not that c-cold..

Lightening: It’s so cold out I think my brain freeze!

Dakota: I’ve done bikini shoots in worse conditions, this’ll be a breeze.

Staci: Wh-where is Ch-chris… I know he's the type to be into masochism but I didn’t know he also dabbled in s-sadism.

[Chris walks out in a full thermal jacket and baggy pants]

Chris: “Ice” to see you guys again!

Mike: [scribbling furiously in his notepad] Gotta write that down!

Chris: This next challenge is a simple game of capture the flag, however it comes with two parts. One, build your snow fort. This will be instrumental in defending your flag from the other team. Two, try to get the other team’s flag by any means necessary. Horseplay is allowed and encouraged. Now I was going to go ahead and give one of you a massive advantage due to the events of the last challenge but then I decided.. nah! You guys tied anyway so it doesn’t really matter.

[the contestants whine in unison]

Chris: Now, as you all freeze to death, I’ll be enjoying some nice cocoa. Have fun! [laughs]

Staci: [CONF] If I was on trial for the murder of Chris McLean I would not be surprised if I was granted free bail.

[the teams separate to their own space]

[Radioactive Rats fort]

Sam: I think it’s pretty clear what needs to happen here. Us men will be in charge of building and the girls will pack snow for us.

Dakota: [raises eyebrow] Why is that so “clear”?

Sam: Men perform at a higher level than girls do could do. Think of any gamer competition! There's like no girls. It's solid scientific evidence.

Dakota: That's because girls have better things to do then play Kirby!

Dawn: Don’t you think you should assess your language before speaking to us? It’s not like you’re one to talk - you didn’t even attempt to try to help us in the first challenge.

Sam: Yeah, because my secret was actually embarrassing and not something trivial like some weird chick’s never met her parents. You got the easy one.

Dawn: [seething] Mother Earth, please forgive me. For I have never felt such utmost repugnance for someone at once.

Scott: Sam, I think that’s enough.

Lightening: He right th-

Scott: [covers Lightening’s mouth] I said that’s ENOUGH!

Scott: [CONF] I need Sam to pack his fatcakes and scoot his cankles outta here. Lightening doesn’t need to be taking any heat off him. God, it’s gotten to the point where I have to be the voice of reason. [facepalm]

[Mutant Maggots fort]

Mary: Follow my demands and this can be easy. Me, Brick, and Mike will do everything and the rest of you can play in the snow and make sure the others don’t try any funny business. Got it?

Anne Maria: [sprays hairspray, completely ignoring Mary’s ramblings]

Brick: Actually, I think I have a different approach. The more, physically inclined members could ward off the approaching team, since they’ll be likely sending out the less physically capable individuals, and we can more easily maneuver our way down.

Zoey: Personally, I think it’s degrading that my efforts to the team is being minimized to playing in the snow. That’s like, not a vibe.

Mike: Agreed with Zoey! Like usual. Haha.

Mary: I SAID follow MY demands!

Molly: Weren’t you the one who caused our loss, and by extension, cause us to be down in numbers? Wouldn’t it be counterproductive to continue to listen to your instructions? Just a thought.

Molly: [CONF] I told her I took note of her “we aren’t friends” comment. Just holding her to her truth.

Mary: Hey! Why don’t you go back to playing with your stupid rock?

Molly: Fine by me. I’ll make sure to remember that when I play with the pen I’ll use to cast my vote if we lose tonight.

Anne Maria: Pasty ain’t wrong.

Mary: Pfft, you don’t even care about winning! You just care about your stupid poof!

Anne Maria: At least I’m honest about it! You be out here storming up and down the walls with your superiority complex. Ya ain’t nothing compared to anyone, fussy.

Mike: I think Brick would make a great leader.

Mary: [looks at Zoey] Don’t forget who defended you this morning.

Zoey: Well… I think letting Brick take a hit at being leader wouldn’t hurt.

Zoey: [CONF] Intimidation tactics don't work on me. I won't silence my voice for some ogress who thinks I owe her something.

Mary: Sellout. [crosses arms]

Brick: Okay, let’s get started!

[Radioactive Rats fort]

Sam: [sitting in the corner, playing on his GameGuy while everyone else is working] Come on guys, pick it up! Do you want them to beat us or what?

Dakota: You know, it wouldn’t kill you to help! [shoveling snow]

Sam: I am helping! I’m playing Tower Defense 4! It maps out your surroundings and give you tips on how to best defend yourself.

Dakota: But I wouldn’t know cause I’m a stupid girl, huh?

Sam: Well, now that you mention it…

Dakota: Defend yourself against this! [chucks a snowball at his face]

Sam: Ow! Chicks be crazy, ya feel me Lightening?

Lightening: Uh...yeah, I feel ya brother.

Lightening: [CONF] When it comes to playful banter with the guys, you best believe Lightening is all in! But that Scott is one scary dude when he’s mad and he told me to lay off. I don’t wanna dig myself in a hole with Sam, he’s too wide for both of us to fit! Plus, he’d probably stank up the hole.

Dawn: Violence is never the answer, Dakota. [looks back at Sam] Which is why you cannot tell anyone I gave you this. [hands her another snowball]

Staci: [glances at the girls, sighs, and keeps working on the fort. B approaches her.]

B: [taps on his chest and gives her a thumbs up. She smiles]

Staci: [CONF] I’ll admit it, it’s nice to have SOMEONE who notices the effort you put into things. But I wish someone would notice my newfound rocking bod-ay, as I’ve been working out my back by having to carry the weight of my entire team on it! [throws her arms up and rolls eyes]

[Mutant Maggots fort]

Zoey: [seething as she looks over at Anne Maria's lack of participation]

Mary: Ah, I see your angry. Maybe now you know how I feel.

Zoey: Listen, you defended me. Nothing more. It’s not like I owe you my life or something.

Mary: Maybe so. But let’s not forget who was on the wrong side of the vote last night. If you don’t play your cards right it could happen again.

Zoey: Are you threatening me?

Mary: [grunts] Call it what you want. [Molly walks by carrying a bundle of snow.] Hey Molly, help me finish up this wall!

Molly: [shrugs her shoulders] You said you didn’t need my help. [She walks off. Mary seethes.]

Zoey: I see we’ve landed ourselves in similar situations.

Mary: Exactly why I offered you a proposition, rookie. You can knock off tan-in-a-can if it means I get to bump Molly Pocket down a peg.

Zoey: Hmmm, I don’t know. I’ll have to think about it.

Mary: Are you SERIOUSLY that married to the idea of not trusting in me? I’m a likable… leader!

Zoey: [arrogantly] Call it what you want. But I make sure I keep my promises. So I'll think about it.

Zoey: [CONF] Mary has some nerve coming to me for help. She thinks just because she wears size eleven runners and can make Uma Thurman envy her calves that I have to listen to her. I’m a rebel, I make my own rules.

[Radioactive Rats fort]

Scott: [stands in admiration of their fort] I gotta say, this ain’t half bad. Maybe you bunch of knuckleheads are good for something after all.

Dawn: [nods] I have to say, I am in agreement. The proximity is perfect and the architecture is in fine taste.

B: [does a peace sign]

Staci: You say knuckleheads as if it was a team effort. ¾ of this fort would test positive for my DNA because I put my BLOOD and SWEAT into it. And I never put effort into anything except not putting effort into things.

Dakota: Lacey, is it? You should really calm down. It’s not that like, big of a deal! What matters is that WE got it done! [smiles eagerly] Not you, Sam. You still suck major eggs.

Sam: [unaware of his surroundings as he is still focused on playing his video game]

[Mutant Maggots fort]

Brick: Alright, team! I’d say we have quite the mighty fort here. Now we have to plan our method of attack. Myself, Mary, Anne, and Molly will attack the other team. Which means Mike and Zoey, I’m putting you two in charge of defense. Don’t let anyone in and remember where the snowball stack is located. Should you all follow my instructions to a T we will be sure to secure a W. All clear?

Mike: [salutes] Sir yes sir!

Mary: Whatever. I still don’t see why I can’t be the leader.

Molly: We already tried that and you made us lose, remember? [Mary looks about ready to snap her neck, but Molly remains indifferent.]

Molly: [CONF] Trust me, I’m well aware that my comments about Mary aren’t doing me any favors in gaining her admiration. Do I care? Not particularly. She needs me more than I need her. Isn’t that right, Baxter? [She pulls out her pet rock]. Isn’t he the sweetest?

[Snowballs are being hurtled at Brick, Mary, and Molly. They seem to be using Anne Maria as a shield, with her hair deflecting all the snow.]

Brick: I gotta admit, I was expecting more of an active opposition. Where is the other team?

Dakota: Oh my gosh, they’re like! Inching closer!

Dawn: Oh, my.

Sam: If you girls are soooooo capable, why don’t you stop them? [smashing away at the buttons to his GameGuy]

Dakota: I have an idea, Dawn, and like all of my ideas, I end up being the center of attention. [swiftly grabs Sam’s console and chucks it, all the way to the Maggots base]

Sam: NO! I WAS SO CLOSE TO DEFEATING THE FINAL BOSS! [flares up angrily and begins to run]

Dawn: W-was that the plan? I’m not opposed to it b-

Dakota: Quick, I’m going to distract them. You go run off and do your teleportition magic-y stuff so we can win!

Dawn: It doesn’t quite work that way, it takes a lot o-

Dakota: [grabs camera] Why hello there, audience! Renowned socialite and fashionista, Dakota Milton would like to take your attention for a brief moment, however you won’t want to look away! Watch this! [starts prancing around like a fool, attempting to look graceful] Hit the music, Chef!

Chef: [hits play on death industrial music]

Dakota: [seethes] Wrong channel!

Chef: [hits play on fluttery orchestral music]

Dakota: The MAJESTIC Dakota Milton shall now DEFEAT any ne’er-do-wells in her path! [starts dancing like a fool]

Brick: Oh no! Her dancing! It’s so… blindingly bad!

Mary: Shut up you fool! Keep mushing!

Anne Maria: [takes notice to Dakota’s awkward movement] Toots think she can dance? Oh, I’ll show her! Back in Jersey we know how to BOOGIE!

Mary: You’re not even FROM Jersey! Augh! [facepalms] We have to keep going.

Molly: If you want to be hounded by snowballs, be my guest.

Brick: Anne Maria, return to your squadron effective immediately! We must finish this challenge!

Anne Maria: Whatchu talkin’ bout Brick? I’m already winning the dance challenge! Ohh yeah. [twerks]

Brick: [facepalms] NOT what I meant at all.

Mary: [picks up the spray can that Anne Maria dropped] Oh, did you forget something?

Anne Maria: Huh? You WOULDN’T..

Mary: Try me. Step AWAY from the horrendous dance moves or forever hold your peace.

Anne Maria: Ugh, fine. I pulled a muscle tryna keep up with Dakota’s moves anyway, you got style girl.

Dakota: [winks and giggles] Ahw, thank you!

Mary: Enough girl-on-girl dancing action. Move, Maggots, MOVE!

[the four Maggots begin making their way, meanwhile on the other side, Dawn is preoccupied visiting with cockroaches ten sizes larger than her, completely unafraid]

Dawn: What a delightful life story. It was so nice meeting you! ...Oh, wait, [puffs cheeks] I was supposed to go help Sam… [looks back down to the cockroaches] So, how are the children?

[Mutant Maggot fort]

Sam: [completely ignoring the flag and kicking around the snow looking for his gameguy, causing the fort to decompose slowly] Where IS it?

[outside of the fort, Zoey and Mike are talking]

Mike: I love waffles too.

Zoey: I… didn’t say anything about waffles.

Mike: Yeah, on second thought, pancakes are better.

Zoey: Hey, is our fort getting smaller?

Mike: Maybe it’s just looking smaller because of how long we’ve been here.

Zoey: [shrugs] So anyways, let me tell you about my first time seeing Slowdrive in concert.

[Radioactive Rats fort]

B: [tossing snowballs at the other team with Scott] Scott: This is miserable. Have they not even got there yet? My frostbite has frostbite!

Sam: [walking back] Heyo.

Scott: WHERE is the flag?

Sam: Oh, I was supposed to get that? Completely slipped my mind. [whips out his device]

[the men all glare at him]

Lightening: Ooh, boy. You just keep pushing on Lightening’s buttons. You gonna get STRIKED!

[the boys begin to scuffle, while behind the fort, Staci is pacing back and forth]

Staci: I can’t believe I built this entire fort for nothing! They aren’t even grateful, not that I care… why am I talking to myself? Just forget it! [kicks snow, but actually hits something else] OW! What was that? [pulls out a large reflective tool] Oh, this must be what B was working on while I was making the fort! Well, at least he gave me some credit. I owe it to him to preserve his work. [places the tool by a frozen block of ice, unknowingly causing the sun to reflect off of it and melt her team’s entire fort]

[the boys on her team stop their fighting and look at eachother for a moment]

Sam: Uh. What just happened.

Staci: Hehe. [flushed]

Staci: [CONF] From this point forward we are going to revise history and claim that was intentional…

Brick: Aha! Gotcha! [grabs flag]

Chris: And with that, Brick has crowned the MAGGOTS as the winners of this episode’s challenge!

Scott: Ugh.

Lightening: Seriously?!

Mary: Haha, take that suckers!

Molly: [silently whispers under breath to Mary] I wouldn’t be so gleeful, Mary. After all, this sort of just cements Brick as our team leader, doesn’t it? Your stock just dwindled. What a shame...

Mary: You-

Molly: -did SO good today Brick! [claps] We couldn’t have succeeded without your leadership. Right, Mary?

Mary: [sarcastically] Affirmative.

Brick: Ahw, shucks. It feels so weird being dominant, I’m always the submissive one. Always!

Anne Maria: Too much info.

[the scene changes to the contestants now surrounding Chris]

Chris: For winning today’s challenge, the Maggots have secured safety and ALSO a reward! [pulls out tray] hot chocolate and croissants!

Zoey: Woah, really?! [grabs hot chocolate and immediately spits it out] This tastes like dirt!

Chris: [chuckles] I said hot chocolate, not good hot chocolate. Anywho, Rats, you’ll be kicking one of your own to the curb tonight. See you sooooon!

[Mess Hall. The Mutant Maggots are “enjoying” their reward of hot chocolate and croissants.]

Anne Maria: [knocks on her hair, making a metalling clanging sound, then knocks on the croissant. It makes the same sound] Huh.

Mike: [trying to be smooth] You know Zoey, this hot chocolate isn’t the only thing in the room that’s hot…

Zoey: Mine’s ice cold actually.

Mike: No kidding! Mine too!

Zoey: Uh huh...were you trying to flirt with me or something?

Mike: Me? Course not! I’m cool as a cucumber! Chill as a chili pepper! Swag as a-

Zoey: I got the message, you can retire from your nightjob.

Mike: [CONF] Okay, let me just get something off my chest. I...am developing feelings for Zoey. Yeah, yeah I know, she’s one of those not like other girls types, the total stereotype. But still, she’s nice. Especially in comparison to some of the rest of the girls on this team. I don’t know if I’m ready to make a move yet but I definitely want to get to know her a little better!

Zoey: [CONF] Mike’s a nice guy. And not in that “only acts nice to get in your pants” type of way like the sleazeballs on the Rats. I’m perceptive enough to know he has feelings for me but...he’s just not really my type. I like people who have a sense of security and independence. But now it's sucky because I feel like it’s on my shoulders now to break the news before he gets too attached.

[Brick is seen trying to bite into his croissant. Mary slaps him on the back, causing him to cough it out]

Mary: I gotta hand it to ya. That wasn’t half bad of a performance for a bedwetter.

Brick: I’m not…

Anne Maria: Hey, leave him alone will ya? Just cause he pees his pants all the time don’t mean he’s less than twice the leader you’ll evah be!

Brick: Thanks Anne Maria, but I’ll handle this. Mary, I want us to remain strong as a team but if we’re going to continue our success in the future I’ll need you to put a stop to any form of bullying tactics you may elect to use on me or any other member of this team. We need to keep morale at a high if we’re going to win challenges, and you making people uncomfortable does quite the opposite!

Mary: Whoa, I was asking for a handshake, not a lecture! You might’ve helped us win today, but that does not make you any better of a leader than I am. But fine, I’ll cool it with the nicknames if it puts your panties in such a twist. Put ‘er there and it’s a deal. [Mary reaches out her hand]

Brick: [sighs] You’re just not getting it. [He stands up and silently leaves the mess hall]

Mary: I...what? What did I do wrong?

Molly: [smirks] Some leader you are.

Mary: I don’t wanna hear it from you.

Molly: Fine, you don’t have to listen to me. But if you really want Brick to listen to you...you should step up as the leader at the next challenge.

Anne Maria: Are you some type ah crazy? She’ll just make us lose again!

Mary: That’s a bunch of baloney! What kind of game are you running here, Molly?

Molly: No games. Just something to consider. [she finishes her cocoa mug and stands up] Excuse me, I need a refill.

Mary: [CONF] Of course I want to implement my superiority to my team but they’re still trying to throw me off MY game because of their [fingerquotes] “feelings”, and I am not someone who takes lightly to “emotion”. Luckily, I have the resume to knock their socks off come next challenge without being the leader. [smirks]

[Meanwhile, at the Radioactive Rats mansion porch. Lightening has gathered the guys: Scott, Sam, and B]

Lightening: The way I see it, here’s what’s gotta go down. Us guys pile four votes onto Staci, that way we’re eliminating the possibility of a girls alliance and cutting the fat of the team! It’s sha-genius!

Scott: Sure, but what if she had an immunity idol? Then it’s sha bye-bye for one of us.

Lightening: Well uh, in that case- huh. I didn’t think of that.

Scott: You don’t think of much do you? [gets up from the stairs, cracking his back] I’m going for a walk. Tell me when you come up with a plan with some legitimacy. [he walks off]

Lightening: Well now, that’s just sha-rude!

Scott: [offscreen] I don’t sha-care!

Scott: [CONF] [bouncing a rock off the wall] It might seem a little underhanded but if I’m ever going to get my way on this team I need to make everyone else’s ideas look stupid in comparison. Getting rid of Staci isn’t something I’m necessarily against considering she totally blew the challenge for us, but as long as there remain other options to keep the heat off my back I don’t mind throwing a few grinds into the gear. Heh… did I say that right?

[Sunset on the Dock of Shame. Staci has her bags packed on one end and sits down, sighing and staring at the colorful ocean.]

Staci: … [sighs]

[Dakota comes and sits down next to her.]

Dakota: [leans back] Hey, killer sunset tonight, right? Would be perfect for some quick candid snaps from the paparazzi. I called them, like, an entire hour ago and they’re still not here!

Staci: Haven’t seen them.

Dakota: Are you like.. mentally stable right now?

Staci: Not entirely…

Dakota: Do you want an online session with my therapist? She works woooonders.

Staci: I don’t think that would do me any favors.

Dakota: Well what’s got ya so down and out? [She takes notice of the luggage.] Oh. Oh, I see. Well cheer up, it’s not over yet! Not until the fat lady sings!

Dakota: [CONF] Note to self, don’t let Staci sing.

Staci: Don’t patronize me. It is over. Everyone’s writing my name down tonight and I don’t have the idol to save myself which means so long, Staci. Everything in my life always surmounts to this.

Dakota: I’m not like, a genius or anything, but it sounds like this is about more than just the game.

Staci: I tried so long, to prove to people that I can be useful. But time and time again it’s just gone unnoticed. No one ever cared about the good things I do, they only focused on the bad. Eventually I just decided to stop trying and let myself become that shell of a person they always thought I was. That’s why today in the challenge, when I did try to push myself into doing something productive and nobody noticed, I just kind of had… a moment. I just wanted somebody to notice me.

Dakota: That must be so rough…[Staci nods]...it’s not really the same thing, but I can relate somewhat. Being in the spotlight isn’t always what it’s cracked up to be. There’s cameras on you every second, looking to catch just one little slip up to put in the tabloids. [shivers] The tabloids. I’m sorry, I wish I could be more help but I’ve never been super great at this whole “life advice” sorta thing.

Staci: [wipes away a tear] It’s okay, it just helps to have someone to listen.

Dakota: And hey, you can always count on me as a friend.

Staci: [CONF] I’ve never had someone make an attempt to get to know me like Dakota did today. If I go home tonight and there’s anything I can take away from this experience, it’s a good friend. [smiles]

Dawn: [under the dock, collecting sea shells] Ahw, that was so sweet!

[Staci and Dakota look at eachother, slightly out of fear]

Chris: Welcome Rats to your first Elimination Ceremony. Dakota, how did it feel to lose the challenge today?

Dakota: We’re super bummed. It’s not like we’re out here for a super long time or anything but we’ve still grown sorta close. So it’s tough to be potentially sending a friend packing.

Chris: Scott, any idea who might be in danger tonight?

Scott: That’s a bit of a loaded question, Chris. I don’t think I want to answer it.

Chris: Is there anyone here that wants to admit they’re in danger tonight?

Staci: [raises her hand] I’ve heard my name come up a lot since the challenge and I can’t blame anyone for doing so. I totally wrecked our chances tonight, and I truly am sorry. If anything, I can promise I’d never be such a burden again. [Dakota looks concerned]

Chris: Does anyone else want to apologize for their actions out here? ...Anyone? [Lightening nudges Sam]

Sam: Uh...yeah. I’ve had some people come up to me today and say I’ve been rubbing some of the girls the wrong way.

B: [shakes his head, then motions to the entire team]

Sam: Okay, everyone! Look, I know I’m not the easiest guy to be around but that’s sorta the way I was raised, you know? If the team wants me to change my attitude I will and I’m sorry if I offended anyone. But I think I have a lot more to offer.

Chris: I’ll leave it at that. It is time to vote. We’ll start with Lightening.

[Lightening gets up]

Staci: [holds up a ballot reading “SAM”] I don’t know what else to do. You just rubbed a lot of people the wrong way, and I hope my plea to stay was enough. Sorry.

Sam: [holds up a ballot reading “STACI”] Wah wah. [blows a raspberry]

Dawn: [her vote is unseen] I do think you are on your way to becoming a better person. I just don’t think this is a safe environment for you to do so.

Chris: I’ll read the votes. First vote...Sam.

Sam: Yep, saw that one coming.

Chris: Second vote...Staci.

[Staci looks disappointed but not surprised.]

Chris: Staci. That’s two votes for Staci, one for Sam.

[Staci just hangs her head in shame while Sam breathes a sigh of relief. Scott looks on deviously.]

Chris: Next vote...Sam. That’s two for Sam and Staci

Sam: What?

Chris: Sam. That’s three for Sam, two for Staci.

[Sam shudders while Dakota simply winks at the camera.]

Chris: Second person voted off Total Drama Reloaded...Sam.

Sam: Game over man, game over!

Chris: It’s time for you to go. [Sam exits the Campfire Ceremony.]

Lightening: The Lightening does NOT like being blindsided...but he understands why this move was made.

Scott: Wish I coulda told you, but it would’ve ruined the magic.

Dakota: Good riddance to bad garbage.

[Sam is loaded into the Hurl of Shame]

Sam: Can I at least get my GameGuy back before I go?

Chris: Oh, this? [Chris pulls out the GameGuy, sparking and dead from being in the snow for so long.] It’s all yours man. [He tosses it to Sam.]

Sam: Hold on a sec, this is totally BUSTEEEEEEED! [He’s gone]

Chris: With the teams matched 6-6, will anyone be able to come out on top? Find out next time, on Total.. Drama.. RELOADED!

Author's Note: Thank you so much for reading through all of that! We hope you can see the plots sort of forming and coming together and be on the edge of your seat. I know the elimination wasn't particularly shocking, but I can promise you it's about to get real interesting.

Thanks, Amber