User:Rainbowderp01/All Up In Your Drill (Transcript)

[ Theme song ]

_______________________________________________________________________________________

[kids laughing]

[whistles]

Chef: All right, kids, fun time's over! Everyone back inside for a fire safety presentation!

All: Aww...

Courtney: Yay! Fire safety!

Chef: I'm not getting any younger here!

Duncan: Ah! [spits] Ugh. [confessional] Since when does fire safety need a whole presentation?

[fire alarm]

Duncan: [confessional] The fire alarm goes off, it's really annoying, you keep smashing it 'til it stops. There's your presentation.

_______________________________________________________________________________________

Courtney: [squeals] Fire safety! I even read the French version. Either there are different rules for French people, or my French isn't what it used to be.

Chef: Kids, for this special occassion, I wore my fire tie, because our guest today is Fire Chief Blaze.

[crack]

Blaze: Good morning, class!

[siren blares]

Blaze: Stop, drop, and roll!

Chef: [grunts]

[kids gasp]

Blaze: Oh, false alarm. Hey kids, Fire Chief Blaze here. Wherever I go, safety follows. Ah, yeah, you're okay, big guy.

Chef: [groans] Thanks, Fire Chief Blaze.

Blaze: Just a few things off the top. Uh, yes, I get to use a fire pole instead of stairs. And yes, that is my shiny red fire truck out front.

All: Ooh...

Chef: Okay, that's enough truck for now.

All: Aww...

Duncan: [grunts]

[scraping]

Blaze: Now, if you listen up and learn your fire safety rules, you could be just like me one day.

[exciting cheering]

Duncan: Wow...

_______________________________________________________________________________________

[day dream]

[fires blazing]

Duncan: Ha ha, things... are heating up out here. My robot's gonna cool you down!

[water rushes]

Duncan: Sorry fire... you're out.

[ding]

[day dream ends]

_______________________________________________________________________________________

Duncan: I could be so cool.

Blaze: And that concludes our fire safety lesson and safety test.

Duncan: Test? How long was I out?

Blaze: One last bonus question. If you see a fire, you should...

Bridgette: Oh! Save your stuffed animals.

Harold: Use kung fu!

Owen: Oh! Roast marshmallows on it?

Courtney: Wrong! You stay low and go!

Blaze: Correct! You get out and stay out! Bonus point for Courtney.

Duncan: [growls]

Blaze: Now the kid who got the most correct answers will become the official class firefighter.

[siren blares]

Duncan: [confessional] You all saw my hero day dream sequence. I'm the obvious choice to be class firefighter.

Blaze: Your new class firefighter, and clearly, the only kid who listened is... Duncan!

Duncan: Woohoohoo!

Blaze: Could you move over a little? Courtney! Courtney is in charge of fire safety.

[siren blares]

Blaze: You've all gotta listen to her because you've got to respect the hat.

All: Respect the hat! Yay!

Blaze: Everyone's happy.

Duncan: [growls]

Blaze: Good luck, Courtney. Buh-bye!

_______________________________________________________________________________________

Owen: Have you ever noticed how many red crayons there are? Cherry red, lipstick red, fire red.

[siren blares]

Courtney: [grunts] You're fine now.

Owen: Thanks, Courtney. But I'm not sure I was ever in any danger.

Courtney: Uh-uh. Respect the hat.

Harold: Did someone lose a fire red crayon?

Courtney: [grunts]

Harold: Ah!

Courtney: [confessional] I know it isn't like me to get so physical, but now that I'm the class firefighter, where I go, safety follows.

_______________________________________________________________________________________

Beth: Here's your new home, dollies.

[siren blares]

Courtney: No fire exit. Gonna have to fix that!

Beth: But there's no wall. The whole place is a fire exit.

[crash]

Courtney: Huh. This house is structurally unstable. It's being condemned.

Beth: But... where will my dolls live?

Courtney: Respect the hat.

[siren blares]

_______________________________________________________________________________________

Bridgette: "They opened the castle door and there was a dragon breathing fire."

[splash]

Courtney: Respect the hat.

_______________________________________________________________________________________

Chef: Ooh, hot coffee.

[splash]

Chef: [grunts]

Courtney: Respect the hat!

[splash]

Chef: [grunts]

[siren blares]

_______________________________________________________________________________________

[kids snoring]

Chef: All right, kids. Have a nice nap.

Courtney: Fire! The building's on fire!

[all scream]

Beth: Somebody save my dolls!

Bridgette: Grab the stuffed animals!

Chef: What's going on in here?!

Cody: The buidling's on fire!

Chef: Fire! Quick, everyone panic! Stop, drop, and roll!

[everyone screams]

Courtney: That was a fire drill. If that was a real fire, you'd all be burnt toast.

Duncan: [confessional] I want that hat. Almost as much as I don't want Courtney to have it. I thought turning people against her might be hard.

Owen: [confessional] [panting] Let me out! [grunts]

Duncan: [confessional] [laughs] Silly me!

_______________________________________________________________________________________

Duncan: We don't want Courtney to be class firefighter anymore, right?

[agreement]

Harold: She has the hat. You gotta respect that hat. You gotta!

[agreement]

Duncan: [sighs] Okay. But what if she didn't have the hat anymore?

[kid hums dreamy music]

Owen: We could do whatever we want.

Duncan: Just do like I told you. I got the rest.

Harold: Firefighter Courtney!

Courtney: What do you want? I'm still trying to get the treehouse up to fire code!

Harold: I think I see smoke way at the other end of the yard.

Courtney: What? A fire? I don't see anything.

Harold: Really? I-I think you just need to look harder. It was right out there-ish.

Courtney: Huh. I better go check just to be sure.

Harold: We sure outmarted her, heh.

[crunch]

Duncan: Dude, that fruit's plastic.

Harold: Yeah, I knew that.

_______________________________________________________________________________________

Duncan: Everyone, feast your eyes on your new class firefighter!

[kids awe]

Beth: But Fire Chief Blaze made Courtney the class firefighter. You can't be the firefighter just 'cause you're wearing a hat.

[splash]

Duncan: Ah! Respect the hat. Things are gonna change around here.

Bridgette: Can I use red crayons?

Owen: Can I eat cinnamon hearts 'til I puke?

Beth: Can I play with the dollhouse?

Duncan: This house should be condemned. But sure.

Bridgette and Owen: [cheer]

Duncan: [confessional] See? Being a cool firefighter isn't about safety. Being in charge is about letting people do dumb stuff, then spraying them with a hose.

Cody: [confessional] [screams]

_______________________________________________________________________________________

Harold: So you mean I can shove a bunch of plugs into this faulty power bar?

Duncan: Terrible idea. But yep.

Izzy: Can I make these toys into a cake and then bake them in the Tiny Tots oven?

Duncan: Why not?

[clunk]

[sizzle]

Izzy: Mm... burning plastic smell! They're cooking already!

[whirring]

Harold: That's it, Mr. Robot! You can do it!

Courtney: I didn't find any fire, but I hosed down the whole yard! [gasps] Stop, drop, and roll!

Harold: Ow! What was that for?

Courtney: That's a fire hazard! Like, for real. Respect the hat.

Harold: But that's the wrong hat.

Courtney: [gasps] My hat! Why is there fruit on my head? What happened to my hat?

Duncan: What seems to be the problem here?

Courtney: [gasps] Duncan, you stole my hat?

Duncan: No. I earned the hat. By stealing it.

Courtney: But, but, you don't know anything about fire safety.

[splash]

Duncan: I know you need to respect the hat.

Harold: Not respectful at all.

[sizzling]

[fire alarm rings]

Duncan: Ah! What's that noise?

Courtney: [gasps] It's the fire alarm! The real one! Something's on fire!

Harold: What do we do? What do we do?

[all scream]

Bridgette: Duncan, what do we do? We're all going to catch fire!

Courtney: Yeah, Duncan. What do we do?

Duncan: Me? Ask Chef. He's the adult.

[all screaming]

Harold: What do we do?

Owen: What do we do?

Cody: What do we do?

Bridgette: What do we do?

Duncan: What do you do? Think, Duncan, think!

[pop]

Duncan: Okay, so I had like a fire hydrant robot and there was a monster. What do I do again?

Fire Monster: Why are you asking me? I'm as perplexed by all this as you are.

[pop]

Duncan: Listen up, people! It won't be a big deal if we all just hold our breath for the rest of our lives! One, two, three, go! [inhale]

Beth, Izzy, and Owen: [inhale]

Beth: [exhales]

Izzy: [exhales]

Owen: [exhales]

Duncan: [exhales] Okay, fine! I don't know what to do!

Courtney: Forget about the hat. Just listen carefully. First, you all need to stop panicking. It's not a fire, it's just Izzy's cake smoking.

[crash]

Izzy: Hey, it wasn't done! I like my cake extra crispy.

Courtney: But just to be safe, we should all exit the daycare single file and in an orderly fashion.

Bridgette: Good idea.

Beth: Yes!

Cody: I can help!

Owen: Okay!

Courtney: Now, now, move it, move it!

[all scream]

Duncan: Okay, so I guess a firefighter should know what to do in case of a fire.

Beth: Yay for not dying today!

Courtney: Thank you, Duncan. But when we practice fire safety, everyone wins.

Duncan: Maybe now that she's had a taste of real danger, she'll lighten up.

Chef: Okay, all clear and s--

[airhorn blows]

Courtney: Okay, reverse fire drill! Everyone back inside, now, now, now!

[all scream]

Duncan: You're not gonna chill out at all, are you?

Courtney: Nope. Respect the hat.

[credits]