User:Rainbowderp01/Can't Help Falling in Louvre (Transcript)

Chris: Last time on Total Drama... the contestants experienced every pitfall Peru put forward. They visited some ancient landmarks, hung out with the locals, and DJ kept his animal curse alive by whacking some wee-wee monkeys. Someone's feelings were hurt, and something really weird happened. Team Victory had a victory. Ten contestants, one million dollars, loads more exotic locales to destroy, right here on Total. Drama. World Tour!

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[ Theme song ]

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[squish]

[sproing]

Lindsay: Wow, I'm so relaxed. I think my brain is even asleep. [gasps] Yep. Totally asleep. This is great. And the best part is, I can't wait to see--

DJ: His name's Tyler.

Lindsay: I know. I remember. [sniffs] Ew, what is that smell?

DJ: It's my meatless bacon and eggs-alike breakfast. I'm never hurting another animal again.

Lindsay: So now you're a me-gan?

DJ: Vegan. And don't tell mama. She says vegans are chicken-loving chickens.

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Tyler: I'm glad that Lindsay's team won the last challenge and everything, but her being up in first class and me being back here? Oh, it sucks.

Owen: Um, yeah. I know exactly what you mean. When I'm uh, away from Izzy for too long, heh, I get really--

Noah: Happy because your girlfriend is a complete and total nut job? And I'm not talking tiny peanuts. That girl is a Brazil nut-sized nut job.

Owen: Hey, where is Izzy anyway?

Alejandro: I saw her go to the cockpit to talk with Chef.

Owen and Noah: [gasp]

Heather and Cody: [gasp]

[beeping]

Cody: Oh no!

Courtney: What's happening?

Tyler: We're going down!

Izzy: Oh, what does this button do? Oh, and this one?

Chef: Girl, stop that!

Izzy: Ooh, blue button!

[all scream]

Heather: Having some trouble controlling your team, Alejandro?

Noah: [groans]

Alejandro: Your attempts to insult my team are cute.

Heather: Whatever. My girl power team is going to win. We don't get distracted by anything. Especially boys.

Sierra: [crying and eating]

Heather: Get it together!

Sierra: [crying]

Alejandro: [whispers] All clear!

Cody: [confessional] Chris is the one who played the video of me trying to vote her off. So why do I feel like such a schmuck? All I did was vote, which I had to do.

Alejandro: [confessional] How long are you gonna keep this up?

Cody: [confessional] I'm done. Did you know you have a little rip on the seam there just a--

Alejandro: [confessional] Out, Cody!

Izzy: [over PA] [deep voice] Ahem. This is your captain speaking. If you look out your window, you'll get to see what happens when a plane does a somersault!

Chef: [over PA] G-Gimme that!

[beep]

Chef: [over PA] Uh, y'all might wanna hang on to something heavy!

Noah, Alejandro, and Owen: [screaming]

[plane buzzes]

[splash]

Izzy: Whoo!

[thud]

[splash]

Izzy: [laughs] [gurgles]

Chris: You said we were landing at the Eiffel Tower.

Chef: And you said you was gonna replace that curtain with a locked door!

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Chris: I didn't exactly get a chance to prep my introduction, what with the unexpected water landing and all. I'm just gonna give the highlights. France, City of Love, art gallery, filler, lots of artwork, priceless, priceless artwork.

Lindsay: [squeals] Paris! [gasps] There's only one guy I wanna share this with. The guy I've been dreaming about since we've been apart. Where's my Tyler?

Tyler: [clears throat] Hey, Linds.

Lindsay: Are you sure that's you? 'Cause you look slightly different in my head.

Alejandro: [aside to Noah] Everything looks slightly different in her head.

Lindsay: Do you always wear a track suit? Oh, it doesn't matter. Because us being in Paris together means only one thing.

Tyler: I know. I love--

Lindsay: Shopping! [gasps] I can pick out new clothes for you. [squeals]

Chris: There's no time for shopping. The first challenge is about to start! Everyone, inside the Loavre!

Courtney: Uh, I believe you mean Louvre?

Chris: Whatever. Go already!

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Chris: Challenge time, kids!

Chef: Phew.

Chris: Each team gets their very own famous sculpture. Team Victory, yours is Rodin's The Thinker. Chris is Really, Really, Really, Really Hot, you guys get The Venus de Milo.

Alejandro: Ah, Venus. Such beauty.

Chris: Calm down, lover boy. Amazons, you ladies get The Statue of David. Here's how it works. It's up to you guys to find your statue hidden somewhere in the Loaver-uh-riu.

Courtney: Well, that shouldn't be too hard, the statues are big. Plus, I'm amazing at reading brochure maps.

Chris: About that... Chef has broken the statues into pieces and hidden them. First team to find their pieces, race to the Pyramid Court, and reassemble them wins.

Alejandro: But The Thinker isn't located in the Louvre. And The Statue of David isn't even in France.

Chris: Well, we're not using the actual statues. Those are priceless. Chef made some fake ones, right? I almost forgot the twist twist. Here's your motivation.

[beeping]

[creak, thud]

Sasquatchanakwa: [roars]

[chainsaw revs]

[seal barks]

Lindsay: Aw, look, DJ. It's that baby seal you accidentally ran over in the Yukon!

[seal growls]

DJ: [screams]

Chris: I'd start running.

[everyone screams]

[seal barks]

Owen: I don't wanna be yeti poop!

Noah: I got your ginormous back, big boy! Watch this! Totally works on my dog! [sweet talk] Who wants the ball> Who wants it? You want it, don't you? Go get it!

[Sasquatchanawka barks]

Alejandro: Well played, Noah. Now onwards!

Heather: Come on, guys. There's no way I'm gonna let the boys beat us to the Pyramid Court. We have to find the rest of these things fast.

Sierra: [cries]

[chainsaw buzzes]

Cody: Ah!

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Lindsay: These are heavy. Do you think, uh, could you maybe uh... you're just so big and strong, and...

DJ: What? Oh, sorry Lindsay. I'll carry 'em for you.

Lindsay: Oh, good. Because after we win, I was also going to ask you about carrying all those cute stripey boxes you get when you go shopping in Paris!

DJ: I don't wanna win, remember? I wanna go home and stop my campaign of animal pain. [gasps]