User:Rainbowderp01/Monster Cash (Transcript)

Chris: Last season on Total Drama Island... Owen and Gwen battled it out for $100,000. In the end, Owen, a super-sized guy, won a super-sized check. But then gave it all up for the chance to win one million big ones! With the million smackeroos stuffed into a briefcase, our twenty-two campers set off on The Race for the Case! Until the case was eaten by an alligator. Then a shark. [chuckles] I bet you they didn't see that one coming. Haha. Now the fourteen who were the closest to winning have been given the chance to win another million dollars. [snickers] Actually, it's the same money. They've been instructed to report to an old film lot for a whole new set of challenges. Forty-two days. Fourteen cast mates. One heck of a lot of cash! Welcome to Total. Drama. Action!

_______________________________________________________________________________________

[ Theme song ]

_______________________________________________________________________________________

[tires screech]

Duncan: [sniffs] Man, I miss the smell of the city.

Heather: Step off.

Gwen: You step off.

Heather and Gwen: Grr...

Harold: Ow! Sorry, Leshawna.

Leshawna: No harm done.

[bus leaves]

Leshawna: Where is everybody?

Gwen: Uh, maybe we got off at the wrong stop?

Justin: That broken down bus only had one stop.

Heather: I'm not hanging around here.

Leshawna: You're gonna give up the chance at a million big ones? Heh, that's a lot of hair weaves.

Heather: Guess I can stay for a bit.

Beth: Face it. The money's the reason we all put up with Chris.

Trent: Beth, you got your braces off! Nice!

Justin: Hot as ever.

[dreamy music]

[squeak]

Leshawna: You look fi-i-ine, girl!

Gwen: You really do!

Lindsay: You are totally on your way to looking the part of my new BFF. That's my new best French friend. I am so moving to France when I win.

Beth: My mom said my world would totally open up when I got my braces off! She was right! I'm going to France!

Lindsay and Beth: Yay!

[horn honks]

Duncan: Dude, it's about time!

Chris: Hop on, everyone! Come on, people! Sheesh, we haven't got all day! This cart's rented by the hour!

Owen: Izzy! Run!

Izzy: [whistling]

Owen: I mean Kaleidoscope!

Izzy: No one leaves E-Scope behind! [yells like Tarzan]

Chris: Welcome to the set of Total. Drama. Action!

_______________________________________________________________________________________

Chris: This season's hottest reality show will be shot here, on an abandoned film lot.

Lindsay: [gasps] Does this mean we're gonna be in the movies?

Chris: No. It means you're gonna be on TV. And don't interrupt me! Ever!

Lindsay: Oops. Sorry.

_______________________________________________________________________________________

Chris: You'll be spending the next six weeks here, competing against each other in challenges, and for rewards. All for the chance to win some monster cash!

Owen: Yeah, baby! I'm gonna win me some moolah!

Chris: Shush! Like last season, one team will win, and one team will watch one of their own make their way down the dreaded Walk of Shame to the Lamousine.

[muffler backfires]

[coughing]

Trent: Couldn't you have spun for a better ride?

Chris: No. Now, since we don't have the outhouse to dump your deepest darkest secrets in, you'll ditch the dirt in our new makeup confessional!

Lindsay: [confessional] Oh my gosh. A whole trailer full of makeup?! Oh, sorry, I don't use that brand.

Chris: To your left is the Craft Services Tent. Catered by Chef.

[metal crashing]

[raccoon squeaks]

Lindsay: Whoa!

Chris: If you survive Chef, you'll have to make it through our dramatic awards ceremony! Where all but one loser will receive a Gilded Chris Award!

Gwen: [confessional] That Gilded Chris? Ha. What a narcissist! Don't get me wrong, I still want one.

Geoff: We done now, dude?

Chris: I have an eject button. And I'll use it.

Geoff: Please. Continue.

Harold: Whoa. Cool. Is this a dream?

Chris: No, Harold! It is not! But you may soon wish it was. A few months ago, this lot was home to a high-budget monster movie. Until the star began experiencing some... ah, uh, difficulties?

Lindsay: [gasps] Oh no. Did she have like, a mental breakdown?

Chris: Actually, the star wasn't a her. It was an animatronic monster!

[dramatic stings]

Gwen: What happened to it? [confessional] [sighs] In retrospect, I probably shouldn't have asked that question.

[monster roars]

Duncan: Come on, dudes. He's yanking our chains.

[mechanical whirring]

[tires squeal]

Trent: Whoa!

Geoff: Dude!

DJ: [screams]

Chris: Since we're on a film lot, this season's challenges will be based on movie genres. Today's genre?

[monster roars]

Chris: The monster movie! [laughs] Duh.

[everyone gasps]

DJ: Uh. Uh.

[poke poke]

Chris: Down for the count. For your first challenge, everyone must get from here to the cast trailers while our state-of-the-art monster prevents your every move. [chuckles] Chef has kindly offered to control the beast.

[mechanical stomping]

Chris: And... action!

[crickets chirping]

Chris: Uh... that means go.

Heather: Me first!

Trent: Out of my way!

Harold: Hi-yah!

Duncan: Move it or lose it!

Harold: Ah!

Chris: This is gonna be a long season.

_______________________________________________________________________________________