User blog:KarpToEndAllKarps/Total Drama: Misfit Mayhem Episode 2

“Last time on Total Drama: Misfit Mayhem. We met 16 new losers, made two of them climb a mountain, and tried to figure out who the loseriest was. It turned out to be Rick, who tried to pull a Scott only to be discovered and ousted by Luna. Who goes home today? Figure out by watching…

Total! Drama! Misfit Mayhem!”

Alexis woke up early, as she always did, and fell into a pushup position. “1… 2… 3…” Bianca turned in her bed. She was in the top bunk. “Shut up, karate girl.” Alexis glared. “It’s judo, moron.” Bianca tried to get out of bed, forgot she was 8 feet off the ground, and face planted on the cabin floor. This woke everyone up, though Brutus quickly pretended he was still asleep. “You little-” Bianca tried to punch Alexis, who dodged the blow and quickly retaliated with a strong kick. Dennis stepped out of bed and stood between the girls, tired and annoyed. “Stop fighting. We’re already a man down, we can’t afford you two tearing this stupid cabin apart.” The girls glared at each other one last time, then Alexis started doing push-ups again. Brutus got up and walked out of the cabin, and everyone else went back to sleep.

As he walked, Brutus noticed someone lurking in the shadows. Lil stepped out and chuckled. “Your team’s kind of a train wreck, isn’t it?” Brutus smiled. “Yeah, I could use an ally on the other side.” Lil nodded. “So we work together, reach the final two, and split the prize?” Brutus nodded in agreement, and they shook on it.

Conf: Lil laughed. “He actually trusts me? What an idiot.”

Conf: Brutus was chewing his thumb. “An alliance with Lil might not be the best idea. She clearly plans to betray me. Still, she should carry me pretty far.”

In the Arrow cabin, both Alice and Joanne got up early and went outside by force of habit. After bumping into each other, Joanne started talking to her. “Oh, hey! It’s so weird not having to wake up early, isn’t it?” Alice nodded “Right?” They started conversing.

A few hours later, Chris woke up the rest of the camp with his usual air-horn routine. “Rise and shine, idiots. Head to the mess hall for breakfast.” The campers all woke up, walked through the woods, and ate their meals. After everyone was done, Chris got everyone’s attention and started explaining the challenge. “Today, you guys will have to make a statue of whatever you want made of only materials you find out here in the wild. You have until the sun goes down in 8 hours starting… NOW!” The two teams ran into the forest, looking for anything that could be used. John immediately pointed out a bunch of rocks. “We can use that to build a replica of Chris’s face!” Instantly, his team ran over to the stones and started putting them together. Meanwhile, the Eagles grabbed a bunch of sticks and started trying to build a kind-of scarecrow, but it kept falling apart.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:2.4;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Conf: Dennis was frustrated. “I really prefer nuts and bolts to sticks and stones. Nature is so irritating!”

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:2.4;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">The Arrows were working together well, nearing the end of their statue. Meanwhile, nobody on the Eagles had any clue what they were doing.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:2.4;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Conf: Bianca looked ready to kill someone. “There’s no way I’m losing another challenge.”

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:2.4;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">She snuck over to the Arrows creation and started talking to John. “Say, isn’t this like that one episod-” John perked up. “Season 4, episode 9. Grand Chef Auto, censored to Extreme Chef Auto in a few countries.” Bianca pretended to be impressed. “You know, if you bring that up to Chris, he’ll be super impressed!” John smiled. “I will!”

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:2.4;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">With 1 hour left, it was starting to look hopeless for the Eagles. Alexis groaned. “We need some sort of rope!” Dennis noticed some spanish moss hanging from a tree. “Hey, we cou-” Without a word, Luna climbed the tree and grabbed some of it, landing perfectly. Matthew snickered. “For once, Chris’s lack of geographical knowledge was useful!” Nobody laughed.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:2.4;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Conf: Matthew sighed. “That was a lot funnier in my head.”

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:2.4;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">With 15 minutes left, both teams were almost done. The Arrows had a rock formation of Chris, while the Soaring Eagles had tied together sticks using spanish moss to make a humanoid figure holding a bow.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:2.4;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">The intercoms came on, and Chris called time.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:2.4;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Conf: Bianca smiled. “My pathetic teammates couldn’t screw this up if they <span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:italic;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">tried.”

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:2.4;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Chris walked by the Eagles creation. “Honestly? There are more puns to make here than you can shake a stick at.” Brutus gave an incredibly believable fake laugh.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:2.4;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Conf: Brutus chuckled. “I have this little brother who thinks he’s super funny. Fake laughing is something I’ve had tons of practice at.”

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:2.4;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Next, Chris walked to the other team’s creation. John approached him. “It’s based on Mount Chrismore.” Chris nodded. John kept talking. “You know, the one that Chef tricked the campers into defacing and then Duncan destroyed?” Chris nodded slower that time. “You know, I thought we’d make one that wouldn’t get blo-” Chris stopped him silently, the look on his face dripping with anger. “After tough consideration, I’ve decided that the Eagles win the challenge and the Arrows are sending someone home.” Tistan stepped up to Chris, “That’s not fair! You only said that so-” “Do you want today to be a double elimination?!” Chris snapped. Tistan backed off.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:2.4;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Conf: Bianca laughed. “Honestly, how did that Rick moron go home first on an island covered in idiots?”

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:2.4;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">The Arrows all argued and pointed fingers, but it was pretty clear who was going home.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:2.4;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">At the campfire ceremony, Chris was holding marshmallows. “First treat goes to Mary, with no votes. With her in the no-vote club are Lil, Joanne, Alice, Thomas, and Jason.” Chris paused as the camera focused on Tistan and John. “And the last marshmallow goes to: Tistan, with two votes. John, you’re gone.” Tistan looked somber before stepping up. “I’ll take the exit in his place.” Chris glared. “No.” The camera cut to John, in the Cannon of Shame. “Any last words?” John sighed. “You’ll just inter-” Chris fired the cannon, then addressed the camera. “We’ve got 14 left. Who’ll leave next? And who’s here ‘til the end? Find out by continuing Total! Drama! Misfit Mayhem!”