User:Rainbowderp01/Niagara Brawls (Transcript)

Chris: Last time on Total Drama World Tour... the gang nearly turned into Swedish meatball pops. But our competition heated way up as Duncan put the burn on Alejandro by convincing Owen not to trust him. But Alejandro was too busy working up Courtney to notice. Steamy! That meant Heather needed a little management, but Alejandro was up to that too. Sizzling! Is there anything this dude can't handle? We'll see. 'Cause this time, I'm adding someone who's gonna kick things up to thermonuclear! This show is so hot, it'd take about a gazillion gallons of water to cool us off! And we got 'em. Comin' up on Total. Drama. World Tour!

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[ Theme song ]

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[rat squeaks]

Ezekiel: [munching]

[all snoring]

[dream sequence]

Owen: [chuckles] Great grape and gravy gumdrops, I love this dream.

[airplane buzzes]

Owen: Mm, airplane food.

Alejandro: [chuckles]

[pop]

Owen: You can't use candy canes for evil!

Alejandro: [maniacal laughter]

[pop]

Owen: [screaming]

[dream ends]

Owen: Huh? Huh? Ah! Oh! Wake up, guys!

Courtney: Wha? Ah? Ah! [screaming]

[all scream]

Chris: Hey kids, you better get into your paddle boats!

Courtney: [screaming]

[everyone screaming]

[splash]

Chris: Ooh...

Sierra: I'm starting to question my mom's crush on Chris just a little.

Owen: Uh, w-w-water--

Courtney: Yes, Owen. We know we're in the water.

Sierra: [gasps]

Heather: Wa... wa...

Alejandro: Waterfall! Quick, paddle!

Owen: We're all gonna die!

Courtney: If you let us live, I will tutor any brain dead person who requires it. Even Duncan.

Duncan: If we live, I'll forget she ever said that.

Cody: If we live, I'll let Sierra kiss me! What? Like we're gonna make it.

Sierra: [gasps] I. Want. My. Kiss!

Owen: Oh!

Sierra: [grunts]

Owen: [screams]

Team Chris, Heather, and Cody: [screaming]

[all but Sierra screaming]

[all groaning]

Sierra: Don't worry, Cody. I will restore your breathing and save your life.

Cody: My breathing is just fi-- [muffled speech]

[kissing]

Cody: [muffled] 'Kay... now I can't breathe! [confessional] [gargle] [spit] [sip] [gargle] [spit] [retches] [vomits]

Chris: So, Niagara Falls is pretty awesome, eh?

Heather: It almost killed us!

Chris: Like I said, awesome. The Falls is the jewel in Canada's crown, and one of the top ten natural wonders in the world. It's also known for its fabulous casino, which is where we'll be heading for the first part of the challenge!

Duncan: Oh, man, seriously?!

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Duncan: Seriously?

Chris: Since you're all underage, we had to move the challenge from the gambling floor to the far less exciting casino concert hall.

Owen: Ooh, I wonder if anyone's performing!

Chris: You're in luck, Owen, my man. Last time on the Aftermath show, they had a Second Chance Challenge, where one of the losers could score a spot back in the game. And we're about to enjoy a little number from the winner.

Cody: Gwen? Is it Gwen?

Duncan: That wouldn't suck.

Courtney: Yes, it would!

Chris: She's two hundred pounds of sassy in a ninety pound package and she's wearing twelve pounds of mascara. It's... Blaineley!

Alejandro: ¿Qué?

Courtney: What?

Heather: Who?

[Blaineley]

Blaine-Blaine-Blaine-Blaine

Blainerific is my name

Dishing dirt is my game

Invading your TV with my Blainelicious frame

[Owen]

B-Blainerific

S-S-So, terrific

[Blaineley]

I'm f-f-famous, famous

[Courtney]

This is so against the rules

Does Chris think we're a bunch of fools?

[Chris]

Rules? This ain't no Sunday school

Miss Thang up there's a ratings jewel

[Blaineley]

B-Blainerific

[Heather]

M-M-Make me si-ick

[Blaineley]

I'm f-f-famous, famous

Blaineley: Get me a half-fat no foam latte steamed to a a hundred two heat. I'm quite specific.

[Owen]

She's Blainerific

[Duncan]

So, so horrific

[Blaineley]

I'm f-f-fa--

Cody: Who's that girl again?

Blaineley: What?! Who am I? Who am I? Who are you? I'm the host of the puppy bachelorette, I was nominated for a Gemmie award, I interviewed you for Celebrity Manhunt!

[Blaineley]

It's a fact and scientific that I'm still Blainerific

[Courtney and Heather]

She's not so famous

Turns out she's not so famous

Blaineley: Oof. Whatevers. So which one of these lame teams am I on, anyway?

Chris: You're on your own. Because as of right now, there are no more teams.

Courtney and Heather: Yes!

Alejandro: Well, gentleman, it's been an honor. I trust our brotherhood can continue in some manner?

Duncan: Of course, man.

Owen: Oh, sure! We're buddies all the way to the end! Right, Dunc?

Duncan: [gasps]

Chris: Since we are in the honeymoon capital of the world, I thought it'd be cool to drop some arranged marriages on you. [chuckles]

Sierra: [squeals]

Chris: Check it. Slots o' Fun for me, not so fun for you. Each girl pulls a lever to win a husband she'll team up with in today's challenge. Cha-ching!

[ding ding ding]

Sierra: [confessional] [hyperventilating] Husband! Cody! [squeaky] Forever!

Boys: Ow!

[bear growls]

Heather: Um... what's the bear for?

Chris: Casinos are all about excitement. And what's more exciting than a big, angry bear?

Boys: [screaming]

Owen: Nice doggie.

Chris: Trust me, you don't wanna land on that guy. Let the games begin! Sierra, you're up!

Sierra: Mama needs a new pair of Codys!

[ding ding ding]

Sierra: [gasps] No!

Alejandro: Ow! Help me someone, I'm stuck!

Chris: Sierra, you've won--

Sierra: This isn't happening. This isn't happening. This isn't happening!

Heather: I better take him. She won't stop unless somebody does.

Blaineley: Why do you get to take him?