User:Rainbowderp01/Snots Landing (Transcript)

[ Theme song ]

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[kids hum theme]

Courtney: [grunting]

Bridgette: Did you pull this all the way from home?

Courtney: Yes! Today's my show-and-tell day!

Beth: [confessional] Everyone knows that Courtney is the best shower and teller. Last time, she brought in a talking goat!

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[flashback]

Courtney: Little known fact, goats scream when they're scared. Rah!

[goat screams]

[glass breaks]

Courtney: Harry, come back!

Chef: That was a good one, Courtney!

[flashback ends]

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Beth: [confessional] Okay. Maybe it's more of a screaming goat than a talking one. I can't wait to see what she makes scream today!

Bridgette: What is it? What is it? What is it?

Courtney: Oh, I can't show you yet. It'll spoil the surprise.

Bridgette: Please? Please, please, please, please, please?!

Courtney: Well, okay! This is my ultimate dream dollhouse!

Beth and Bridgette: Ooh...

Courtney: I designed every piece of it myself.And my dad helped me build it. It took a year to make! It has everything I want my house to have when I grow up. Even a crafting room!

Beth: So you can spill glitter on the floor and no one will get mad?

Courtney: Exactly! There's an extra wide chimney for Santa, and a cozy g-- [gasps] Wait... where's my couch? Uh. no, no! Nonono, it can't be gone! Have you seen it?

Bridgette: Uh-uh.

Courtney: Have you?!

Beth: Nope. Absolutely not.

Courtney: I need that couch, or I can't do my show-and-tell. It has to be perfect!

Beth: [confessional] I may have stuck it up my nose when she wasn't looking. And by "may have", I mean I totally did.

Courtney: I know it was there when I left the house, it has to be here! Things don't just disappear!

Izzy: And sometimes... they do!

[poof]

Izzy: Can't see me, can you? 'Cause I'm invisible!

Bridgette, Harold, and Owen: Um...

Harold: Don't worry, Courtney. We'll help you find it!

Owen: Yeah!

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Owen: [eating] Not in the chip bag!

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Bridgette: Not in the sandbox!

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Harold: No couches in the toilet!

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Izzy: Not up here! I did make a new friend, though. I'm gonna call him Linty. Fly, Linty, fly!

Noah: Izzy, you know that, that, that bird is uh... [sighs]

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Courtney: So, no one found my couch?

Harold: Nope!

Bridgette: Sorry!

Owen: Nah!

Courtney: [sniffles and cries]

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[in Beth's nose]

Couch: Uh, hello? Anybody?

Hot Dog: Hoo! What's up, brah? Welcome to the inside of Beth's nose.

Crayon: They call me Fire Engine Red.Good to meet you.

Couch: How did you all get in here?

Hot Dog: We are the chosen ones, dude. Bask in the glory.

Crayon: She likes shoving things up her nose. That's how I got here.

Couch: Wow. So you just sit around all day making stuff out of Giggle Dough?

Hot Dog: Uh, yeah. This isn't Giggle Dough.

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Courtney: [crying]

Beth: Don't cry, Courtney. It's still a cool house!

Courtney: I can't show my house if it's not complete! A home's not a home without a couch. [sniffles] And I was so excited for show-and-tell. [crying]

Bridgette: Oh... poor Courtney. I wonder where her couch went.

Beth: Well, I know what you're thinking, but it's not up my nose! Why did I even say that? [chuckles nervously] Haha, 'cause it is.

Bridgette: Her couch is up your nose? How did it end up there?

Beth: I can't help it! I just really like putting things up my nose!

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Doctor: Beth, you're gonna have to stop putting things up your nose. You're running out of room up there!

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Beth: I can't stop!

Bridgette: Can't you just... you know, pick it out?

Beth: I've been trying to pick it out all morning, but I can't find it!

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[in Beth's nose]

Hot Dog: Groovy house, man.

Couch: It's where I used to live. Just looking at it makes me feel warm inside.

[all gasp]

Couch: What just happened?

Hot Dog: Nose picking. Ugh. It's a thing people do. Best not to think about it.

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Bridgette: Have you tried blowing your nose?

Beth: That's not a real thing.

Bridgette: Try it. Keep your mouth hole closed and blow out of your nose holes.

Beth: [strains]

[fart]

Bridgette: Ew.

Beth: Oops. Heh heh, wrong hole.

Courtney: Maybe if I rearrange the furniture. No one will notice. No! No! Eh, it's not working. No matter how I style it, mom and little Kate have nowhere to sit! Maybe I dropped it outside!

[kids hum dramatic music]

Bridgette: At least she stopped crying. That's good, right?

Courtney: [screams]

Beth: Wow. She really loves show-and-tell.

Courtney: [grunting and screaming]

[glass breaks]

[car alarm blares]

Chef: Those darn teenagers are leaning on my car again! I'm coming, Betty!

Courtney: [screams]

[Izzy]

Dead, dead, dead-y, dead

'Cause Courtney's gonna get you!

Izzy: [laughs] I'm so glad I'm not you.

Beth: Quick! You guys have to help me get her couch back!

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Harold: These were the smallest ones I could find.

Beth: Here goes nothing.

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[in Beth's nose]

Hot Dog: Whoa, man, something's got me!

Crayon: Hot Dog! Hang on! Grab hold of my... darn it, why don't I have arms?!

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Beth: Hey, I remember this hot dog.

Owen: Yum!

Bridgette: Owen, no.

Beth: We need another idea, fast!

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Bridgette: Okay, let's get that couch!

[plunging]

Bridgette: Nothing?

Beth: [nasally] Nothing. I feel kinda weird. Does my face look funny?

Bridgette: No. No. Not at all!

Beth: [nasally] Phew. That's a relief.

Bridgette: Yeah, let's go see if anyone else has an idea.

Cody: I have one!

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Cody: It's called a Neti Pot. It's made for clearing out your nostrils!

[splashing]

Beth: Okay. Pretty sure that's not what teapots are for. Duh! But it gives me a great idea!

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Beth: Give her, Owen!

[splash]

Beth: Great plan, Cody.

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Courtney: [sighs] You put all of your heart and soul into something, and then it just disappears. My dad and I worked on that house for a year.

Gwen: Yeah. That's really sad. Can I have my chair back now?

Courtney: I can see why you like this chair, Gwen. It lets you shut out the world so you can just swim in a pool of your own misery. What's the point of anything?

Gwen: [growls]

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Gwen: I don't like sharing my chair. You have to fix this.

Beth: Guys, it's time we called in Chef.

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[sand sweeping]

[zen music]

Chef: [sighs]

[wind blows]

Beth: Chef?

Chef: Hey, my sand!

Beth: I put Courtney's dream couch up my nose but I didn't know it would make her all griefy and I feel really bad and I need help getting it out of my nose so she can do her show-and-tell.

Chef: Okay, I know just what to do.

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[whirl]

Chef: Anything come out?

Beth: Nothing.

Chef: Well, we tried. Attention, kids! Show-and-tell will be in five minutes! Today, we have Courtney presenting! [confessional] I'm looking forward to this! That screaming goat was a hoot!

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Beth: [sighs] Guess I better tell her the truth. Hey, Courtney. Are you getting ready for show-and-tell?

Courtney: Yes.

Beth: But I thought you said you'd never be able to show it without all the furniture.

Courtney: I've decided that it's okay if my show-and-tell isn't perfect.

Beth: So you're not mad anymore?

Courtney: Nope. My time in Gwen's egg chair gave me perspective. The show-and-tell must go on!

Izzy: Walk away. [squawks] Walk away.

Beth: Phew. 'Cause I have something I need to tell you.

Izzy: [squawk] I wouldn't do that.

Beth: I stuck your couch up my nose.

Courtney: Wait, what?! Why are you just standing there, give it back!

Izzy: [squawks] Should've listened.

Beth: I've tried everything but I can't get it out!

Gwen: Have you tried sneezing?

Bridgette: We really should've thought of that.

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Gwen: I filled this bucket with everything that makes people sneeze. Pepper, dander, pollen, perfume, spices, fizzy drinks, and cat fur.

Beth: [gasps]

Gwen: I just need a feather.

Izzy: One feather coming up! Don't worry, Linty. This won't hurt a bit. [grunts]

Gwen: Yeah. because--

Noah: He's really got a lot of feathers!

Gwen: Whatever. Now, take a big sniff.

Beth: This is for you, Courtney! [sniffs] I don't feel... feel... wait... ah... ah...

Harold: Hit the deck! She's gonna blow!

Beth: Ah... ah... choo!

[splat]

Owen: My silver dollar!

Harold: My peewee ninja!

Chef: My watch!

Courtney: My couch! And it's covered in boogers! But it's back. Thanks, Beth.

Beth: Phew. I promise I will not stick anything else up my nose again for as long as I live!

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Courtney: My dad carved this couch and I painted it myself. Mid-maud is totally trending right now, which is why I went with the green paint.

Beth: [gasps]

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[in Beth's nose]

Crayon: [sighs] All by myself.

Hot Dog: Looks like somebody needs a hug.

Crayon: Hot dog!

[happy music]

Crayon and Hot Dog: Aw, still no arms.

[kids hum ending]

[credits]