User:Rainbowderp01/Walk Like an Egyptian - Part 2 (Transcript)

Chris: Let's take a few moments to review some of the features of our aircraft. Safety is our number one priority, so please remain seated with your seat belts fastened at all times. And the plane has one exit located here! As we explore our exotic destinations, take time to familiarize yourself with the local architecture. The world is our playground. But remember, refusal to sing will lead to immediate disqualification. When divided into teams, be sure to give your crew a catchy handle. Upon arrival at our final destination, one lucky competitor will receive a parting gift to remember. One million dollars! So stow that carry-on baggage and lock those tray tables in the upright position. We're taking off on one crazy ride. Right here on Total. Drama...

[Chris]

World Tour!

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[ Theme song ]

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Izzy: Ooh, look. Team colors!

Harold: Why the heck is our mat yellow? We're no cowards!

Leshawna: Relax, sugar. The map's gold 'cause Team Victory's in first place!

Gwen: I can't believe Duncan got disqualified just 'cause he won't sing.

Heather: Maybe he can't sing.

Courtney: Oh, he can do anything he sets his mind to. A-And now he's stuck on the plane, waiting for a ride home. Poor thing. He must be miserable.

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Duncan: [humming "Come Fly With Us"]

Chris: Did I just hear you--

Duncan: No.

Chris: 'Cause it sounded like you were--

Duncan: But I wasn't and I never will. [slurps] [burps] Ahh...

Sierra: Duncan and Courtney fans will be devastated, but I think you and Owen have a shot at becoming fav Total Drama Couple on my fan site.

Izzy: Owen's magic. When he breathes, his nose whistles the national anthem!

[whistling]

Sierra: Super cute! But he's no Cody. Did you know Cody slept with a stuffed emo named Jerry until he was... well, okay. He still does.

Noah: And you know this how?

Sierra: I called his aunt once. I pretended I was a telemarketer.

Noah: Ooh, stalker-licious.

[gong sounds]

Chris: Mm. Oh. Don't know about you guys, but I am loving Egypt! Mm. And I'm gonna love it even more watching you enjoy your second challenge. The Amazing Camel Race!

Harold: Where are the other camels?

Chris: There are no other camels. It's a camel race. Not a camels race.

Heather: Yes!

Alejandro: What?

[goat bleats]

Leshawna: We won last time! But they get a camel, they get a goat, and we get a stick?!

Chris: Each reward has its advantages. Trust me. You'll be racing to the world's most infamous waterway, the Nile. Teams must bring their rewards all the way to the finish. You have sixty seconds to strategize.

Heather: Move it, people. It's a race.

Courtney: Uh, hello? It's Team Amazon, not Dictatorship Amazon.

Heather: Great. Well, I'll stop being bossy when you start doing things right.

Izzy: Hey, yeah! I get the throat! [making strange sounds] I just introduced myself in Camelese.

Gwen: I bet you did.

Cody: Oh. Hey. Fancy meeting you here. Well for a slushie later?

Gwen: Cody, hey. Listen, I still really appreciate you setting me up with Trent that time.

Cody: Nice, right? And now that he's gone, huh? Yeah. I'm available.

Heather: Hear that? It's the sound of girls all over the world running an rushing just desperate to... lock their doors.

Courtney, Gwen, and Izzy: [laughing]

Cody: [confessional] I'll win her over eventually. It's just a matter of time. And persistence. And humiliation. And I was born to be humiliated.

Alejandro: We need no camel! We have each other. And we are unstoppable! We have the will and the strength and together, we will triumph!

Owen: Yeah!

Tyler: Yeah!

Noah: All right!

Sierra: [confessional] Look, I'm the number one Total Drama super fan. It says so right in my blog. But Alejandro? He's never even been on TV before. I've never seen him in QT Monthly. I do not know what these girls see in him. They're loco.

Bridgette: [confessional] Geoff. Okay, I know maybe it looks bad, but I want you to know that I was not swooning over Alejandro. It was just the heat. I just wanna run my fingers through your thick, dark... blond! Blond hair!

Harold: Hoowah! Hi-yah! On the bright side, I can use this stick to defend us from deadly sand snakes. They could be anywhere.

Lindsay: Eee!

Leshawna: Ah! No way!

Harold: [grunts] [struggling] Fear not. I will protect you. Hi-yah!

Ezekiel: Ow!

DJ: Whoa. Cool it before you really hurt somebody!

[bird squawks]

DJ: What the...? [confessional] First, I accidentally destroy a mummified dog, and now I assault a bird? Man, I love animals! This never would've happened back home!

Alejandro: Sierra, Owen, up, up!

[goat bleats]

Tyler: [groans]

Owen: [chuckles] This is so cool, Ale-handout! Or Alakazam. Ah, I'm just gonna call you Al, okay? Woohoo! Go, Al!

Noah: [sarcastically] Yeah. This is gonna work.

Alejandro: Have faith, Noah. Believe in us.

[crack]

Tyler: Whoa. We're perfectly balanced.

Noah: Okay. Color me impressed.

Alejandro: [cockpit confessional] It's basic weight distribution. Anyone with degree in engineering or an IQ of 163 or higher could figure it out. By the way, you're doing a magnificent job flying this plane.

Chef: [cockpit confessional] Who, me? Nah...

Alejandro: [cockpit confessional] Now now, don't blush. It's true.

Chef: [cockpit confessional] [giggles]

Chris: A'ight. Nile's that-a-way. Kinda big, blue, and watery. Can't miss it. Or I guess you can, but then you'll die. Probably get killed by the local scarab beetles. It's mating season and they get all... kill-y when they're in heat.

Leshawna: I am glad there aren't any out here. Those things are nasty!

Chris: I'll tell them you said so.

[scarabs scuttle]

[intern gasps]

Leshawna: [screams]

Harold and Lindsay: [screaming]

Team Amazon: [scream]

Tyler: [screams like a girl]

Chris: [chuckles]

Lindsay: The stick will save us! Hop on, guys! Go, stick!

[musical ding]

Chris: Ooh! Time for a song! Think of it as a mini challenge. Music can soothe the savage mate-seeking scarabs, so make up a good song and maybe they won't kill ya.