User blog:KarpToEndAllKarps/Total Drama Misfit Mayhem Episode 7

'''Chris fidgets with the camera, and the video catches on. “Sorry about that. We had a couple of technical difficulties, so we had to take a break for…” Chris pulled out a smartphone. “Almost a year. Whoops. Anyways, we’re back, and our contestants have inexplicably not aged at all. In the past five episodes, we met our cast of idiots. Pretty soon we’ll be merging. Let’s see who doesn’t make it there on the long-awaited return of Total! Drama! Misfit Mayhem!”'''

'''It was early morning. Lil and Brutus each discreetly left their cabins and met up. Brutus spoke first. “I think our biggest concern should be the friendship between Alice and Joanne. Neither of them seem too threatening, so we should be able to split them apart without too much trouble, but together they’re very dangerous.” Lil shook her head. “We’ve been too active. We need to back off a bit and allow the losers to eliminate themselves.” Brutus shrugged. “Yeah, that might be our best bet.” '''

'''Suddenly, Lil noticed something and dragged Brutus into the bushes. Alice and Joanne entered. “Did you hear something?” Alice asked. Joanne looked around. “Yeah, I think so…” Lil leaned next to Brutus. “They’re going to find us. We have to make out.” Brutus flinched. “What?” “Think about it! If they find us randomly hiding from them, they’ll figure out we’re in an alliance.” Joanne looked towards the bush, noticing the whispering. Lil pulled Brutus toward her and kissed him as Joanne discovered the duo. “Whoa!” Lil feigned shock, while Brutus actually freaked out. '''

'''Conf: Brutus was shaken. “What kind of person just does that?” '''

'''Conf: Lil smirked. “Brutus got very flustered. That’s a good sign.” '''

'''Joanne reeled back in shock. Alice moved closer. “What is it?” Joanne pointed at Lil and Brutus. “You two are…” Lil stood up. “Keep quiet about it, okay?” '''

'''Conf: Joanne was in shock. “I saw them talking, but I didn’t think they were a couple…” '''

'''An hour later, Chris woke the camp and led them to the beach. “For your first challenge in a year, we decided to drop you off in the deep end.” He gestured to a high-dive board. “Each of you will jump from this board with as much flair and style as possible. Here to demonstrate is Zoey, who participated in Revenge of the Island and no other season!” Zoey climbed the board, bounced a single time, and dove cleanly into the water, flipping three times. “I’ll give each jump a rating from 1-10. You have 30 minutes to figure out your dive and get props together: the team with the most points wins! Of course, because the Soaring Eagles are one person up, they get to choose someone to sit out.” Everyone pointed to Thomas. “That’s fair.” Thomas moved over to a bench off to the side. '''

'''Conf: Thomas sighed. “They probably won’t vote me off if I’m not participating.” '''

'''“For the rest of you, your time starts… NOW!” Chris shouted, sending all of the contestants to the prop closet. '''

'''Dennis, of course, grabbed some mechanical parts. '''

'''Conf: Dennis shook his head. “How am I supposed to use my talents in this challenge?” '''

'''Conf: Luna seemed a bit worried. “Dennis might get eliminated if we lose today…” '''

'''Mary grabbed a permanent marker and some poster board. Bianca, determined not to lose again, gave Matthew a couple of props to help his dive. Alice and Joanne were distracted by what they had seen this morning, but put together some promising props. '''

'''“The 30 minutes is up!” Chris shouted. The teams lined up. “Arrows, you go first!” '''

'''Brutus did a simple dive straight down. He was given 5 points by Chris. '''

'''Conf: Brutus shook his head. “I couldn’t really focus today…” '''

'''Bianca dove holding a metal baseball bat, flipped once, and struck a rock with the baseball bat, cracking the rock. Chris gave it 7 points. Dennis jumped feet-first and released some simple flying drones about halfway through. He landed in the water and earned 4 points. Matthew did a simple feet-first jump holding another baseball bat and twirled in the air holding it, but didn’t stick the landing, striking a rock on the way down. 3 points. '''

'''Conf: Bianca sighed. “That idiot.” '''

'''Luna got a running start on the board and leapt forward holding a bow with a single, blunt arrow. She fired an arrow, which flew directly above Chris’ head, before performing a flawless swan dive. Chris clapped. “10 out of 10, bringing your team’s total to 29.”'''

'''Conf: Luna looked proud of herself. “That’s one of the most impressive shots I’ve landed.” '''

'''“Next, we have the Eagles. Let’s see if they fair any better.” Alice and Joanne both landed simple jumps, earning 5 points each. “Step up your game, farm girls!” Thomas shouted from the bench. Mary jumped feet-first and pulled out a sign that said “Follow me on Instagram!” with her username below it. Chris gave it a 0. '''

'''Conf: Mary was offended. “I ruined my hair for a zero?” '''

'''Lil completed a simple swan dive, earning 7 points. Finally, Tistan dove, hit a rock, and started to bleed. “Oh my god! Somebody help!” His shirt was soaked with blood. Chris freaked out. “We can’t handle another lawsuit!” He rushed over to Tistan, who wasn’t moving. “Wake up!” Tistan opened both eyes and smiled. “Gotcha.” He pulled padding out of his chest, which cushioned his fall, and multiple patches of fake blood. Chris pulled back. “Impressive. 10 points, bringing your team’s total to to 27 points! Sorry, Eagles, but you lose.” '''

'''Conf: Thomas smiled. “I hate that we lost, but it’s great that Mary’s finally going home.” '''

'''At the voting ceremony that night, Chris was holding his marshmallows. “First marshmallow goes to Tistan, with a breathtaking performance and zero votes. Also with zero votes are Lil, Alice, and Joanne.” All four caught their marshmallows. Mary and Thomas sat with no marshmallows. “And the last marshmallow goes to…” Chris paused, allowing the camera to focus on each camper’s face. Thomas rolled his eyes. “Stop trying to play up the tension, Chris. We all know that Mary’s going home.” Chris glared at Thomas. “Mary, with one vote.” Thomas was taken aback. “Mary got a zero! Why didn’t you guys vote her off?” Lil shrugged. “We all like Mary. You’re the most worthless person on this island, Thomas.” Thomas stuttered. “Screw you all!” Chris chuckled. “You had to expect this. You’ve had zero respect for your fellow teammates since you’ve dropped on this island, and you haven’t been an asset to your team. You should’ve gone home ages ago.” Thomas sighed. “Whatever.” Chris put him on the cannon. “Any last words?” Thomas rolled his eyes. “Just fire.” Chris shot him to the horizon. “And with that, 10 remain. Brutus and Lil are officially fake-dating, Alice and Joanne are the only ones who know, and somehow Matthew is still here. Who’s next? Tune in next time to Total! Drama! Misfit Mayhem!” '''

(The schedule is the main reason the fic started to overrun me, so I'm just going to post the episodes as they come out. If you want the rest of the episodes, just check my user blog!)