(kept forgetting to post this one... oops... ANYWAYS PLEASE LEAVE YOUR THOUGHTS DOWN BELOW, AND I MEAN ALL OF YOU, AUWIHFHW)
Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island, our campers were faced with a brutal task. Consuming loads of Chef's disgusting food. This was by far, the grossest episode ever! Unfortunately, it was also the scariest. One of our contestants......was just fine! Owen is fine! He was never in any danger. (Chris whispers to an intern) Don't let the audience know that there was actual danger. (Intern nods and Chris turns back to the camera) At the Bonfire, everyone voted Owen, except for Owen, who voted Sam. Therefore Sam and Owen got the boot... Is what you would think! Lake's parent so rudely interrupted the ceremony and apologized to Lake for being crappy parents, convincing Lake to quit the show. Lake and Owen, boom, out of here! Looks like Sam is safe. For who long? Who knows. Noah warned others about Alejandro, and Alejandro formed a new alliance! So, no more boys vs. girls. It's for real this time. Get ready, sit back, because this episode is out to blow your mind. Will Alejandro pull anymore heinous tricks like he did to Owen. We will try our best to make sure he doesn't. Oh, and how did he poison him, you ask? Turns out Alejandro swiped some leftover Fugu Blowfish from a past challenge. Aw well. Owen's fine though. He's alive and well. Who will be voted out this week? Find out at the most dramatic bonfire ceremony yet. Find out tonight on TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND!
===Dining Hall=== (Everyone is lined up to receive breakfast. There is more food than usual now that Owen’s gone)
Aiden: I’m getting kind of tired of this slop to be honest.
Anne Maria: Ain't we all, kid?
Courtney: They had better be serving us some better food sometime soon.
Duncan: Is it not your cup of tea, princess?
Courtney: What do you mean? This shouldn't be anybody's cup of tea.
Duncan: I've tasted worse. (Winks at her. She scoffs)
Leshawna: (is sitting across from Jo, muttering at her) She-hulk.
Jo: (muttering back at Leshawna) Fatso.
Leshawna: Hairy Legs
Jo: Lard Lady. (both growl in each other's faces)
DJ: (Is in line waiting with Bridgette, Trent, and Gwen) Man, they are at it again.
Gwen: Who wants to make bets on who wins? I say Leshawna has got this.
DJ: I don't know. Jo is pretty ... gruff? But yeah, Leshawna is nicer and might show mercy. Jo could take advantage of that.
Trent: Leshawna would have no problem taking her down. No mercy required.
Bridgette: I think fights are unneeded and we should hope that they don't fight for real.
DJ: Hey, Gwen, where's Hunter?
Gwen: (Blushes) We're kinda taking time apart from each other.
Trent: Aw, you guys were really cute together. As cute as- (Chef serves them more glop)
Gwen: Impeccable timing, Chef.
DJ: (looks behind Chef) His kitchen seems normal. So why all of the bad food?
Chef: What did ya say!? MY FOOD IS WHAT!? (DJ cowers. Gwen remains emotionless)
Trent: Your food is bad.
Chef: (gets in his face) I SWEAR! YOU SHOULD DO THE COOKING! If this was the boot camp challenge, I would make you sit in the BOATHOUSE!
DJ: (hides behind Trent) Sorry, sorry! Augh!
Gwen: But this ISN'T the boot camp challenge. You had your chance. (Chef throws a hatchet at them. It misses) Okay, we're leaving.
Cody: Hey Zoey, can I sit here?
Zoey: Sure! (Horn blares) Huh? What was that?
Cody: I don’t know. (The horn blares again) What is that?
Hunter: It’s coming from the Dock of Shame!
=== Dock of Shame === (The campers are all standing near the dock. They are looking out at the lake)
Cody: So, where's the sound coming from?
Chris on Loudspeaker: HELLO CAMPERS! IT'S ME, CHRIS MCLEAN! IF YOU WERE THINKING THAT THAT SOUND WAS ME...THINK AGAIN. WILL YOU TURN YOUR ATTENTION TO THE DOCK OF RETURNING, PLEASE?
Sam: The Dock of what now?
Leshawna: The Dock of Returning? What are you talkin bout?
Chris on Loudspeaker: I MEAN...THE DOCK...OF RETURNING. THAT IS WHAT THE DOCK'S NAME IS FOR THE NEXT....TWO MINUTES. (the horn blares again. Everyone turns to the lake. They see a shape, speeding towards the island)
Noah: What IS that?
Courtney: It’s a yacht!
Hunter: Why would a yacht be here? Sure would be one heck of place for tourists.
Tess: No, there's people on it! I can see them!
(they see a figure standing on the yacht)
Aiden: OH COME ON!
Trent: Not him!
.
.
Yul: You morons are still as stupid as ever. You should be giving me a proper greeting.
(YUL HAS RETURNED)
Aiden: Who invited him back?
~> Noah: Was he like..a fan favorite or something? (bluntly) Nice going, fans. You have terrible tastes... Well, not entirely. (He holds up an immunity idol) I guess you DID give me this.
~> Zoey: This island was JUST getting peaceful and friendly again!
Trent: You may be back, Yul, but we don’t have to be okay with it.
Yul: Whatever. You people are a bunch of untamed mules.
~> Alejandro: Okay. I may postpone everyone's eliminations. This guy just...has to go. He just HAS to.
~> Yul: Whats up, Total LOSERS. Yeah, these freaks thought they could eliminate and silence me, well guess what, this show just made me even more famous! HA!
DJ: (sees someone else on the yacht. The other person is climbing over the railing) Who's that? Wait a minute!?
???: (Waves) Eh! Hey guys! Pleasure to be(Falls face first onto the dock)
Leshawna: It's...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Ezekiel: (Coughs and gets up) Hey guys! I'm back.
(Yup, Ezekiel's back. Nice going, FANS)
~> Gwen: Ezekiel's back? What could they possibly want him back for?
~> Jo: I... have mixed feelings about HIM being back.
Karol: Why are you back, Ezekiel!? I should knock you all the way to Toronto!
Ezekiel: (Gulps) Woah woah! I swear I've changed!
Noah: Pretty sure that's what they all say.
Yul: Letting him even touch my yacht, let alone stand on it, was one consequence of being eliminated.
Sam: That's YOUR yacht!? (Points to it)
Yul: DUH. Of course it is. Let's just say I've gained a few extra bucks after getting booted off this craphole of an island.
Ezekiel: His yacht has a pool table, a hockey rink that also turns into a swimming pool, and even a theater, eh! Very canadian, me likey!
Zoey: Indie theater!?
Yul: Yes, you one-braincelled neanderthal. There is an indie theater in there.
~> Duncan: I'm calling it, he's outta here in an episode or two.
(Some noise is heard from inside the yacht)
Tess: Oh no, please don't tell me there's another one of you.
Ezekiel: There is! It's-
(The person comes into sight. Cody screams. You guessed it, Sierra is back)
Sierra: OMG! GUYS! It's YOU! (Hyperventilating)
Everyone: SIERRA?!
Cody: AH! KILL IT! KILL IT WITH FIRE! (Shrieks)
Sierra: YEAH! I was brought back! By popular demand! Or at least partly.
Noah: I find that hard to believe.
Sierra: (Stares wildly) OMG, CODY! You're even more stud-like than I remembered! On the internet, Footbook, Yourspace, Youtude, and all of your possible connections online make you seem so thin.
Cody: Um, what!?
Sierra: I'm healed now, in case anyone was wondering! I'm all better! The pain of losing my hubby was nothing now that I have him back!
Courtney: ... Okay, is that everybody on there?
Yul: If there any more of you losers, I would've killed my-
Chris: (Walks up) Okay! I want you guys to make these newcomers comfortable in their new cabins. Honestly kinda pity the guys. And Cody.
Aiden: I am NOT bunking with Yul. No way.
Yul: Good, because I'm not sleeping with you dweebs.
Trent: And why's that?
Yul: I have my yacht. I'll sleep in there instead.
Chris: Oh no you don't! (Yul groans) DRAAAAMAAA! Alright, get moving! Guys, take Yul and Ezekiel with you. Girls, take Sierra!
=== Boy's Bunk === (The boys take Ezekiel and Yul into their cabin)
Yul: So which of us has to bunk with this loser? (Gestures to Ezekiel) And don’t even think of making me bunk with him or I’ll rip your hair out!
Duncan: (Laughs) Now we’re speaking the same language.
Cody: (Grabs Ezekiel) Don't worry about them, man. You can have the bunk under mine.
Ezekiel: Oh yeah, homie! (Facepalms, still thinking it's cool)
Yul: Well? Who am I bunking with?
DJ: (Sighs deeply)
~> DJ: I guess I’ll be nice and take one for the team.
DJ: (Flatly) You can bunk with me.
Yul: About time!
Duncan: (Pats DJ on the back) Tough luck, dude.
Sam: Oof, total game over man.
Alejandro: I give you my sympathies, DJ.
===Girl’s Bunk=== (The Girls walk into their bunk and show Sierra around)
Tess: I honestly couldn't care less where you sleep.
Karol: I second that.
Jo: I third that.
Sierra: Awesome! (Bunks under Gwen)
Gwen: Eeee. My rotten luck.
Chris: (Enters the girls bunk) Okay ladies! Head on over to the Amphitheater! It's go time!
=== The Amphitheater === (There is a strange set of bleachers with seats in them as though they were desks. The campers all take seats)
Chris: Time to play a fun game called "Say Uncle" This challenge may possible send you to the emergency room. It's that bad. So, here's the rules, you will face off against another camper in a small tournament of tolerance, endurance, and how much pain you can take. When you lose, you're out, no immunity for you. 3 people will be rewarded with immunity. So, let's get this tournament started.
Katie: Uhh, Chris? There’s an uneven amount of people.
Chris: Huh. I don’t suppose any of you would volunteer for elimination?
(They all shake their heads no)
Chris: Well then, I guess we’ll just spin a wheel. Whoever it picks won’t compete in the challenge! Oh, Oliver!
Oliver: Hey, guys! (Sees Yul) Aw crap.
Yul: Ew. Don't tell me that rat's competing again.
Oliver: Chris, did you bring him back just to torture me?
Chris: (Blinks innocently) Maaayyybee. Now, spin the wheel!
(Oliver rolls up a wheel of all 25 remaining contestants. He spins. It lands on Harold)
Harold: What do I do now?
Chris: Eh. You can sit and watch with me and Chef! Oliver, pull up a chair!
(Oliver grabs a chair and Harold sits down and shrugs)
Harold: (Looks at Jo) I think I know exactly what I'll be watching. (Sighs lovingly)
~> Jo: I wonder if anybody has figured who nerdy McGee likes yet. Could be anybody... (Thinks) ANYBODY...
Chris: Now! To reveal who will be facing who!
(ROUND 1)
---
Alejandro Vs Noah
Gwen Vs Hunter
Leshawna Vs Jo
Tess Vs Bridgette
Karol Vs Zoey
Sam Vs Ally
Anne Maria Vs Ezekiel
Duncan Vs Courtney
Katie Vs DJ
Aiden vs Trent
Sierra Vs Cody
B Vs Yul
---
Chris: My lovely assistant, Chef (Chef waves to them while wearing a hockey mask) will be in charge of the tortures.
Leshawna: You know how to make a game lethal, don't you?
Jo: Just zip it so we can begin!
Leshawna: I'll zip YOU!
Chris: How about you BOTH zip it?! Now, first up, we have Alejandro Vs Noah.
Chris: Care to Spin...THE Wheel of Misfortune?
(There is a wheel that has symbols that represent a torture all around the circle of the wheel)
Alejandro: (Gestures for Noah to go ahead) After you, Noah.
Noah: (skeptical) Yeah... Okay.
~> Alejandro: Hm, Noah seems to be catching onto my.. Less than flattering game techniques. I must get him out, post haste.
(SPIN SPIN SPIN. The wheel lands on a picture of a TURTLE)
Chris: Oooh! Turtle Puck Shots! You two must stand on this these small platforms. (one for Noah, one for Alejandro. These platforms are like small tables) Chef will fire these angry snapping turtles at you.
Alejandro: Come again?
Chris: My bad. I said; Angry, chompy, cranky, evil, snapping turtles.
Noah: Not surprised.
Yul: I'll throw in an extra thousand if you make them wear no defensive equipment.
Chris: Yul! That's insane... too bad I was going to do that anyway.
Alejandro: Hit me up Chef! (Chef begins firing snapping turtles. He dodges all of them) It appears I am too shifty for this challenge, right Noah?
Noah: Indeed you are, Al.
Alejandro: (He loses focus for a second and gets a turtle to the rear) AUGH! AUGH! OUCH!
Noah: Well would you look at that. (Gets a turtle to the kiwis) AAAUUGGGHHH (Falls over)
Chris: Okay. Noah is out. Alejandro moves on. (Noah goes to his seat) Oh. Did I forget a little detail about the loser's seats? (Noah's seat, and himself, fall down a hole that opens up under the seat. The seat reemerges as a pillory with Noah in it)
Noah: Might as well just be sent to the 1800's already.
Ezekiel: Oh hey, I made a rap song about the 1800's, eh!
Everybody: ...
~> Ezekiel: (Holds up an album) Check it, homies! Zeke the freak is now an official artist! (Pumps his fists in the air) I've already sold 3 copies, and ONLY two of them were from my mom!
~> Alejandro: Noah may have lots of friends, but he's the obvious brain. I'll make sure to take him out first. That's guaranteed now that he's up for elimination.
~> Noah: I'll be fine. Plus, I have this (holds up immunity idol) I was rather surprised that the fans chose me.
Chris: Mooooving on. Next round is Gwen versus Hunter!
Hunter: (Gulps) Ladies first, hm?
Gwen: Alright, romeo. (Hunter sighs)
(SPIN SPIN SPIN. The wheel lands on a picture on a flaming marshmallow)
Chris: Your challenge is... Fiery Marshmallow Spa!
Gwen: Doesn't sound too bad.
~> Hunter: As a guy, I have to say, spas don't really sound like my thing. That won't matter for this challenge, will it?
Chris: (The two are placed in two different chairs) Okay. Before we even explain. Whoever is the first to freak out or leave the chair, is out. CHEF! (Chef runs over with a bowl full of melted marshmallows. They are still extremely hot. He takes a kitchen spoonful and dumps one on Hunters face and one on Gwen's)
Gwen: Good luck, Hunter.
Hunter: (Scoffs) I should be the one wishing you the luc-... THE PAIN! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (Gets up and runs off flailing his arms)
Chris: Gwen? (She's just sitting there)
Aiden: Doesn't it hurt?
Gwen: Meh. Nothing too bad. (Gwen takes her mask off before grabbing Hunter and ripping his off too)
Hunter: (Panting) .. Thanks.
~> Gwen: (Chuckles) What a clutz. I kinda miss being with him. He needs to learn a lesson though.
Chris: Gwen clearly wins. Next round is Leshawna vs Jo!
Leshawna: Oh! It's on now! You're going down.
Jo: What are you gonna do? Sit on me? (Laughs. Leshawna prepares to slap)
Harold: (Claps and cheers) Yes, Jo! You can do this!
Duncan: Looks like that's nerd's in love with you. (Shoves Jo)
Jo: Huh? Harold? Nah, and if he did, I'd crush him.
Karol: That twig has been fawning over you ever since that canoe challenge.
Jo: (Shocked) Is that true, Harold!?
Harold: Why of course. Why wouldn't it be?
Jo: (Growls at Harold angrily)
Leshawna: And you made fun of me for dating Kai! (Laughs)
Jo: ... I'm not in love with him!
Harold: (Shrugs) Only time will tell.
~> Harold: I'm sure over time, she will loosen up. I will get through to her. She's just rocks my world. Plus, her looks compare to a goddess. A beautiful, weightlifting goddess with golden bangs.
~> Jo: Harold is about as attractive as a mutilated chicken with it's eyes gorged out.
~> Leshawna: (Doubled over laughing)
Jo: UGH! Let's get this over with!
(SPIN SPIN SPIN The wheel lands on a fish in a bowl)
Leshawna: Hey, Jo, that fish kinda looks like you! (Jo prepares to slap her)
Chris: Easy, Leshawna.
(Chef walks over with two, big, fish bowls. They have a hole on the bottom)
Jo: Those are some weird fish bowls. Why are there holes on the bottom?
Cody: Maybe it's a flying fish.
Sierra: (snorts) OMG Cody, that was so funny! You're are a genius!
Aiden: ...Was that sarcasm?
Alejandro: I don't think so. (shudders)
Harold: You can do it, Jo! I believe in you!
(Chef shoves the fish bowls on Leshawna and Jo's head)
Leshawna: What's this? It's like a helmet.
Oliver: (He begins pouring dirt into the small hole at the top of the bowl)
Jo: WHAT!? What's going on!? (dirt is filling up her helmet)
Trent: Oliver, man! Stop!
Oliver: (Gulps) Sorry, man, gotta make money somehow.
Jo: I'M DONE! (Punches the bowl and shatters it)
Chris: WOAH! Jo, you backed out. I didn't expect that.
Leshawna: Ooh, me too! (She starts chanting)
(Jo is thrown into her seat which falls and turns into a pillory)
Jo: This can't get much worse. (She turns left to see Harold sitting next to her)
Harold: Hello, beautiful.
Ezekiel: (High-fives Harold) Aw dude, your doing mighty good with Jo!
~> Leshawna: Now why did the fans bring Ezekiel back!? (Points to the camera) Couldn't y'all have chosen somebody like... Kai? (Sighs lovingly) AHEM.
Chris: What a round! Anyways, It's Tess vs Bridgette next!
Trent: Good luck, babe.
Bridgette: Aww! You too!
Yul: UGH! Just get it over with! (He shoves her onstage)
Bridgette: (Stumbles and sees Tess) Good luck, Tess! May the best-
Tess: Yeah yeah, I know. I'm winning this.
(SPIN SPIN SPIN. The wheel lands on a picture of a raccoon)
Chris: Burnt raccoon! Leftovers from the last challenge! First to finish wins!
(Tess and Bridgette are both handed platters of burnt raccoon)
Bridgette: (Gags) I can't do this! I'm vegan!
Tess: (Starts eating) Sucks for you, then.
~> Tess: I'm still a bit mad at Brick's elimination. Maybe taking it out on Bridgette isn't the best idea ever, though.
(Tess holds up her platter. She's done)
Bridgette: Huh? How!? (She gets up before throwing up on Oliver) I'm so so-
Oliver: Don't apologize. It only makes it more shameful. (Walks off)
Chris: Wow, wonder why he's so cranky today.
Gwen: (Rolls her eyes) Gee, I wonder.
Chris: Well, Tess moves on! Next up is Zoey vs Karol!
Karol: B-But, I can't fight Zoey!
Zoey: And I can't fight Karol!
Sierra: (Hugs Cody) I would never fight Cody.
Cody: Aw crud...
Chris: Tough luck, you two! (The two walk down)
Karol: (Turns to Zoey) Whichever one of us wins, let's still be friends, kay?
Zoey: Yeah!
Chef: MUST I SPIN IT FOR YOU!? Jeez. (Spins the wheel)
(SPIN SPIN SPIN The wheel lands on a picture of a barrel
Karol: A barrel? What does that even mean?
Chris: The lake leeches! YES! I'm glad somebody landed on that one!
Zoey: (Gulps) Lake leeches? Like, real leeches?
Noah: Gee, lake leeches definitely aren't leeches.
Tess: (Turns to Noah) We need to hang out more.
Karol: I'm sure we'll be fine, Zoey. (Chef pulls up the barrels. Two barrels full of leeches) It seems as if I've jinxed us.
Zoey: Well... If I have to. (Gets in the barrel. Karol does so as well)
Duncan: Ladies and gents, I think we're about to watch our first fatality.
Yul: GOOD.
Harold: It would actually be our second, considering Dakota did kill somebody with a blowfish.
Katie: Ah, good times.
Aiden: First of all, that was like a week or two ago, second of all, how was that good!?
Chris: SHUSH! (Points to Karol and Zoey)
Karol: I don't really feel anything.
DJ: (Shivers) Yeah, you don't FEEL anything.
Yul: I can only hope these leeches eat you alive. Wouldn't that be nice.
Karol: (Looks in the barrel) Hey, none of the leeches are biting me.
Yul: Of course they aren't. Who can blame them? They don't want 70 year old blood. (Karol growls at him)
Zoey: Wait... So if none of them are biting you... Then... AHH! (Runs out of the barrel)
Chris: Um...Okay? Karol wins. Next round is Sam vs Ally!
Ally: May the best gamer win, Sam!
Sam: (Groans) I'm actually gonna quit this round so Ally can advance!
Chris: Alright then. That was quick.
Ally: (Blushes) Wow, Sam... That was really nice of you.
Sam: Thanks. So... Do you wanna go o- (His seat sinks into the ground and comes back up in the pillory)
Ezekiel: Yeesh, tough luck, eh. (Pats Sam on the back)
Chris: Speaking of tough luck Ezekiel, it's time for you vs Anne Maria!
Chef: Smooth, man. (Fist bumps Chris)
Anne Maria: (Ezekiel is next to her) Ew, take a step back, farmboy.
Ezekiel: Will do, Ma'am!
(Anne Maria rolls her eyes and spins the wheel)
(SPIN SPIN SPIN It lands on a picture of pants)
Ezekiel: Pants?
Chris: Pants!
Anne Maria: Ooh, I'm so winning this challenge!
Chris: Oops, I meant wooden pants.
Anne Maria: Pft. Whatevs.
Oliver: (Oliver holds up a woodpecker) His name is Jeremy!
Anne Maria: ... Nuh uh. No way. I'm outta here. (Walks off)
Ezekiel: Does that mean I win?
Chris: Uh, I guess.
Ezekiel: Yes! The Zeke-meister finally won something!
~> Cody: "Zeke-meister"? Man, he totally ripped me off! Everyone knows I'm the Codemeister. (Pouts)
Chris: Alright, Duncan Vs Courtney!
Duncan: Good luck, princess. (Courtney rolls her eyes)
Sierra: (Snaps a picture of the two) Ooh! This is a momentous day for the Duncney shippers!
Courtney: Duncney!?
Duncan: Shippers!?
Sierra: Mhm. You two are, like, one of the most popular ships in all of Total Drama! Apart from (Wiggles her eyebrows) Cody and me, of course.
Cody: Make it end, already...
Duncan: (Scoffs) Tell all your little "shippers" that I would never date such an uptight a-type princess.
Courtney: And I would never date such a rebellious scoundrel punk like him.
Yul: UGH. Just kiss already, vermin!
Chris: While that would bring up the ratings... I still wanna see them good old fashioned torture. Spin, that, wheel!
(Duncan shoves Courtney and spins the wheel)
(SPIN SPIN SPIN The wheel lands on a snake)
Chris: Snake WRAP! Okay, bring out the snakes!
Oliver: (walks in) Uh, Chris, one of the snakes got loose.
Hunter: (Feels something against his leg) Oh no...
Chris: (shrugs) Life goes on!
Courtney: Nuh uh. No snakes for me. I'll take my chances WITHOUT getting poisoned.
Duncan: Well then, I guess I win. (Courtney gasps)
Courtney: I change my mind! I-I want back in! (Chris nods)
(Chef puts snakes on them)
Duncan: Hm, kinda tickles. (He sighs relaxingly) What about you, Court?
Courtney: (Eye twitch) I'm... Winning... This.
Duncan: Really? Because it seems like your-
Courtney: AGH! I'm done! (Chef takes the snakes off of her)
~> Courtney: What a punk! If it weren't for Alejandro's alliance I would vote that wannabe emo off the island right now!
~> Alejandro: What a great alliance I have, one of the members is infatuated with me, one is handling a breakup, and two of them are madly in love with each other but won't admit it. (Sits back) But it's fine. Tension is good. (He does an evil smirk)
Chris: Huh. Guess Duncan moves on. Next is Katie versus DJ!
(Katie and DJ look at each other nervously)
DJ: Katie, even if I win, I just want you to know-
Katie: (Smirks) I know.
Yul: BORING! Where's the pain and suffering?
Chris: Coming right up!
(SPIN SPIN SPIN. It lands on a Bee)
Chris: BEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!
Chef: (slathers honey on Katie and DJ) Don't move too much. And keep your arms UP! (they put their arms up)
DJ: (sighs) This is degrading.
Sierra: (takes a picture) That's going on the blog!
(The bees are released and begin to swarm DJ)
DJ: AHHHH! Get them away from me!
Katie: (Chuckles and accidentally swallows a bee)
Oliver: Well that's not good.
Katie: (She coughs up the bee) That was close.
(posting rest in comments)
